Not only are you caring for your precious newborn and adjusting to the demands of parenthood, but you're balancing this alongside caring for your own changing and recovering body.

The fourth trimester is a special time when you get to bask in the bliss of new parenthood, but it's an equally important phase in which you may want to prioritize self care, including daily activities that feel restorative and essentials that imbue your everyday with a sense of ease.

If you're navigating postpartum recovery and experiencing postpartum bleeding, vaginal discharge (like lochia, as your uterus heals), or urinary incontinence, the adult diapers they sent you home from the hospital with are likely totally antithetical to this sense of comfort and ease.

During the postpartum phase, it's normal to struggle to feel at home in your body—it's undergone some major changes, being a human vessel is no joke. With that, postpartum underwear can go a long way in providing much-needed comfort.

Postpartum underwear, like Leakproof Underwear, are specially designed with new moms in mind, offering gentle support, high absorbency, and ease of use during your recovery. If you're still in the pregnancy phase, take our word for it and pack a pair (or five) of postpartum underwear in your birthing bag.

Ahead, we dive into the materials, styles, and options that make for the most comfortable and easy-to-wear postpartum underwear, including our top picks for blending functionality with feeling like your best self during this delicate time.

Important Considerations

• Selecting the right postpartum underwear involves considering material for skin comfort, style for sufficient coverage, and absorbency for leak protection.

• There are a variety of options in postpartum underwear to cater to every new parent’s needs, including reusable, high-waisted, and c-section recovery underwear.

• Care and maintenance of postpartum underwear is also crucial (and surprisingly easy). Leakproof Underwear can be machine washed on a cold-to-warm delicate cycle (pre-rinse optional), and tumble dried on low or laid flat to dry.

Choosing the Best Postpartum Underwear

Your post-baby body is doing some serious healing, and the right postpartum underwear can create a world of difference. So, what should you consider when shopping for postpartum undies? It’s all about material, style, and absorbency.

These crucial factors can ensure that you feel comfortable, supported, and protected every step of your postpartum recovery.

Material & Comfort

When it comes to postpartum underwear, material-type can be a game-changer. What you're looking for are soft, seamless, and breathable fabrics that feel barely-there, while packing lots of leak protection. It should feel like a hug for your sensitive skin.

Leakproof Underwear are designed to feel snug at first, but relax and mold to your natural shape for a perfect fit. Cotton Leakproof options, on the other hand, are made with a cotton-spandex blend for cloud-soft wear.

But it’s not just about the fabric. Design plays a big role too. Quality postpartum underwear should:

• Offer support by being snug.

• Allow movement and adjustment through stretchiness.

• Find the right balance between comfort and support, making sure you feel held in all the right places.

Style & Coverage

Underwear, in general, should feel as good as they look—and that comes down to style and function. Style can refer to different cuts, from high rise to boyshorts. This will depend on your personal preference, though high rise underwear tend to provide the most core and mid-section support.

The right style of postpartum underwear can be an ultimate comfort during the recovery process, and should offer adequate coverage and support. It’s about finding that perfect pair that not only fits right but feels right, too.

Created with life after giving birth in mind, CoreLove High Rise underwear features gentle compression in the form of velvet smoothing bands that provide your core with extra support. Super Leakproof No-Show High Rise underwear are designed to conform to your unique shape, while providing heavy protection against leaks.

Absorbency & Leak Protection

Postpartum bleeding and discharge is natural in the weeks and months following birth, which means the ideal pair of postpartum underwear should provide plenty of absorption and leak protection.

While this may vary depending on your unique needs, you'll generally want to opt for medium-to-high absorbency postpartum underwear with a wide gusset. Ultra Leakproof Zones+ High Rise underwear, for instance, is our most absorbent style to date and absorbs about the same as 9 super tampons worth of liquid. The long, absorbent gusset also extends front-to-back for extended coverage.

Super Leakproof styles, on the other hand, absorb around 4 super tampons worth of postpartum bleeding and feature a slightly shorter gusset.

If you're on the lookout for postpartum underwear, consider your own absorbency needs (which may be subject to change throughout your fourth trimester). Mixing and matching different absorbency levels and styles, from regular Leakproof to Ultra Leakproof, can also ensure you have a versatile rotation—whatever your postpartum needs look like.

Top Picks: Our Favorite Postpartum Undies

Now that we’ve covered the basics, let’s look at the variety of postpartum underwear options available. Here are some options for every new parents:

CoreLove High Rise Underwear

High-waisted postpartum underwear are generally favored by new moms because they combine comfort with extra support for recovering abdominal muscles. While disposable options can do the trick, with reusable panties you have the option to rinse and repeat (literally).

What we love about the CoreLove underwear is that they provide targeted front-to-back support, providing your core with extra structure and stability. Specifically designed with birthing bodies in mind, they can be worn during the maternity and postpartum phase.

They also feature an extended gusset line that absorbs the same as about 3 super tampons worth of blood, sweat, or pee. If one pair won't do, multi packs are your friend. Our Postpartum Kit is the perfect package for any new parent, and includes four pairs of CoreLove undies, as well as the customer favorite BlissFit Leakproof Nursing Bra.

Fit tip: For a snug and close fit, buy your regular size. Size up for a gentler feel.

Ultra Zones+ Leakproof Underwear

Our most absorbent underwear (so far) is a match for those early days of postpartum recovery, when postpartum bleeding may be at its heaviest.

Ultra Leakproof Zones+ High Rise underwear can be ideal for the first days (or weeks) after giving birth due to their high absorbency (the same as about 9 super tampons), high waist silhouette, and extended coverage zones.

Fit tip: If you're experiencing postpartum incontinence, opt for the extended gusset and high absorbency of this style.

Leakproof Cotton Modal High Rise

If you're recovering from a c-section birth and are looking to avoid irritation around a c-section incision, Leakproof Cotton Modal underwear can help manage discomfort. Wearing a high waist fit can help with swelling, while super soft fabric can make for easy wear post c-section.

Made from soft and gentle modal fabric, these cotton blend panties combine comfort with built-in absorbency (about the same as 2 super tampons worth).

Fit tip: This style can be washed just like regular underwear, just use mild detergent and tumble dry on low.

Super Leakproof Underwear

For heavy protection against leaks during postpartum recovery and beyond, Super Leakproof Underwear can absorb the same as about 4 super tampons worth of postpartum bleeding and discharge—and can remain a regular fixture of your period product rotation once your menstrual cycle returns.

Comfy, machine washable, and available in high waist styles, this versatile option is ideal for wearing during postpartum recovery when you want heavy protection with a barely-there feel.

Fit tip: This style is made using soft, stretchy PerformaStretch fabric that conforms to your unique body with wear.

Super Leakproof Dream Short

During postpartum recovery, leaks are unlikely to be the culprit of your sleepless nights. Still, the last thing you should be losing sleep over are leaks from postpartum bleeding and discharge.

Since sleep is so essential to postpartum recovery, having a pair of stress-free sleep shorts with an extended gusset and heavy absorbency (up to 5.5 super tampons worth) is a must. Designed for better sleep without leaks, the Super Leakproof Dream Short can also offer comfort and support post-childbirth.

Fit tip: While this style is designed for overnight wear, they can also be worn anytime for those who prefer a boxer brief type fit.

C-Section Recovery Underwear

For those who are recovering from a cesarean birth, postpartum underwear are just as important to have on-hand. Since your uterus is healing from surgery, you're likely to experience postpartum bleeding and discharge.

In this case, you'll especially want to opt for styles that provide plenty of abdominal support without rubbing up against the c-section incision area, which can cause irritation and hinder the healing process.

With that, c-section mamas will also want to pay special attention to underwear fabrics during postpartum recovery, opting for soft fabrics and seamless waistbands. Gel packs, as well as heat or ice packs can also help reduce swelling and inflammation around the c-section site.

Care & Maintenance

Once you’ve found your perfect postpartum underwear, understanding how to care for them will ensure you get the most use out of them. Proper care and maintenance not only prolong their lifespan but also maintain their quality and functionality.

Machine Wash Warm

When it comes to washing, most reusable postpartum underwear can be machine-washed in cool to warm water on a delicate cycle. Washing at 40ºC (104°F) is not only energy-efficient but also suitable for modern detergents to effectively clean the garments.

You'll also want to be sure to use mild detergent, and to avoid bleach or fabric softener.

To maintain the softness and stretchiness of Leakproof Underwear, a delicate washing cycle is required. Using a wash bag for reusable postpartum underwear can also help protect the underwear during machine washing, preventing damage.

From there, depending on specific styles, your underwear can be tumble dried on low or laid flat to dry.

Pre-Soaking

While pre-soaking or pre-rinsing your Leakproof Underwear isn't necessary, it can help loosen or remove fluid before machine washing. This can be done briefly in a bathtub or sink.

To prevent odor buildup and maintain freshness, toss your underwear in the washing machine shortly after use. Odors can be caused by bacteria growth, which can happen when used underwear are left in laundry hampers or in a washing machine after the cycle.

It’s advisable to promptly remove underwear from the washing machine once the cycle is finished, providing effective odor protection.

FAQs

Can I use regular underwear postpartum?

It's best to opt for postpartum underwear for the necessary support and absorbency during your recovery. Regular underwear may not provide the comfort and support you need.

Should I opt for reusable or disposable postpartum underwear?

You can consider both options based on your needs. Reusable underwear is more sustainable and economical, while disposable underwear offers convenience, especially during the early postpartum days. Choose the option that fits your lifestyle best.

Can I wear high-waisted underwear after a C-section?

Yes, high-waisted underwear is a great choice for C-section recovery as they provide support to the abdominal area and avoid irritating the incision.

My mother, the president of the Ontario Black History Society and a driving force behind the establishment of Black History Month in Canada, has been a constant source of inspiration and wisdom. In this article, I reflect on seven invaluable lessons from her. 

Lesson One: Embrace Your Roots

From a young age, my mother instilled in me the importance of embracing my heritage and cultural identity. She taught me that our history is a source of strength and resilience, and that by honoring our roots, we empower ourselves and future generations. 

One really impactful piece of our history that my mom shared with me, is when she discovered that her father’s family had been in Canada since 1783. 

This is part of her story, our story, our family's story, and because my moms generation was never taught Black History in school, this sparked her advocacy work to ensure Black History was more central for all of us.

Lesson Two: Persistence Pays Off

Watching my mother navigate the challenges of advocating for Black history recognition in Canada, I learned the power of persistence. She was a volunteer who became the President of the OBHS (for 22 years). 

There she was able to build on the work of the founders of the Ontario Black History Society, and getting Black History Month recognized after many years. More recently, in 2022 she was able to get Emancipation Day recognized after 15 years of advocacy.  

I can’t imagine the amount of challenges she faced. In that, she never wavered in her commitment to the cause, reminding me that perseverance is key to achieving success in the face of adversity. She was honoured for her work and received the Order of Ontario. 

Lesson Three: Celebrate Black Excellence

Through her enduring advocacy work, my mother taught me the importance of celebrating Black excellence in all its forms. From literature to art to science, she showed me that Black achievement knows no bounds and deserves to be recognized and celebrated. 

A moment we often reflect on is that my mom was the only non-elected person on the platform to address the nation on the occasion of the first national celebration of February as Black History Month in 1996—an empowering moment that, at age 10, I was able to witness with so much pride. 

Lesson Four: Find Joy in the Journey

Despite the obstacles she faced, my mother always found joy in her work and her community. In her words: “Joy is active resistance, and knowing who you are while freely being able to share that.”

She taught me that happiness is not a destination, but rather a mindset, and that by finding joy in the journey, we can navigate life's ups and downs with grace and resilience.

Lesson Five: Lift Others as You Climb

One of the most valuable lessons my mother taught me is the importance of lifting others as you climb. She led by example, using her platform to uplift and empower those around her, and instilling in me a sense of responsibility to do the same. 

This applies to my work around allyship and teaching others how to support marginalized communities. I have always chosen impact over numbers, and that lesson is truly rooted in what I saw my mother accomplish growing up.

Lesson Six: Knowledge Is Power

As the president of an organization dedicated to the study, preservation, and promotion of Black history and heritage, my mother was a fierce advocate for education and knowledge-sharing. It’s actually one of the reasons she kept her maiden name; to ensure her children weren’t negatively impacted by her advocacy. 

She taught me that knowledge is power, and that by arming ourselves with the truth, we can effect positive change in our communities and beyond. As well as being a voice for others, inspiring much of the EDI (Equity, Diversity, Inclusion) work I do today. 

Lesson Seven: Lead with Love

Above all, my mother taught me to lead with love in everything I do. This is my mantra in life, business, and everything in between. 

Whether it's fighting for social justice or simply navigating everyday life, she showed me that love is the most powerful force for change and that by leading with empathy and compassion, we can create a brighter, more inclusive world for all.

And now, I bring to the stage my powerhouse of a mother, Rosemary Sadlier, to ask a few questions surrounding Black joy, excellence, and advocacy. 

Q1: You once said in an article that Black joy is when a person can enjoy, and “be”, and celebrate who they are in their own reality. When do you feel JOY?

“When I can freely be my true self. Without having to over explain myself, or defend my identity or existence. As well as when I can see people around me flourishing, and feel that I also have the opportunity to flourish. That is Black joy.”

Q2: If you could talk to your 5-year-old self, what would you say to her? 

“I would say you are on the right path, trust yourself, treat others as you would want to be treated. Listen to your mom, she has some good ideas.”

Q3: What are you most proud of (besides me, your favorite child, of course)?

“I’m proud of ALL my kids, they are the true reason I began to do this work first. I’m proud of my publications. I’m proud of the numerous commemorations I have been able to support and see come to fruition.  

“Most of all I am proud of myself, for moving  through some of the challenges that this particular path came with. Lastly, of course I am so proud of my middle kid, Raia, and it's been beautiful to see her follow in some of my footsteps. I hope I can inspire her as much as she has inspired me.”

You're getting the hang of nursing, swaddling, and changing diapers — but what about the big c-section incision right in the middle of your abdominals or the postpartum bleeding? What do you do about that?

Often, public perinatal care post-cesarean birth is focused on infection prevention and external wound closure. Questions of how c-section moms or birth parents are supposed to recover from this major abdominal surgery and return to pain-free living, however, are generally not addressed. 

So, let me — a perinatal and physical therapist with 19 years of experience — tell you about a few tricks that will help your c-section incision heal while minimizing swelling and pain simultaneously.

While there's a trove of accessible resources you can turn to, the healing tonic we're exploring in-depth today is: c-section underwear that provide all the support, compression, and core support you need to embrace postpartum recovery (without having to use adult diapers).

It may sound simple, but such are the building blocks of ensuring a recovery that's as smooth and comfortable as possible. So, let's dive in!

High Waist Postpartum Panties Are Your Friend

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Life After Birth Project (@lifeafterbirth)

After a c-section surgery, there's lots of swelling, and typically the incision site is focused from your bellybutton to your pubic bone. Swelling causes pain and, as a result, can slow healing. When it comes to finding the most supportive postpartum underwear, high waist styles are the most c-section friendly.

High Waisted Underwear that envelops the entire surgical area will gently compress the swelling and allow for a faster recovery.

To boot, High Waisted Leakproof Underwear combines the benefits of subtle compression and protection with an absorbent gusset (like lochia, the vaginal postpartum bleeding you're likely to experience as your uterus heals). 

In contrast to high waisted underwear, low waisted underwear may compress the wrong area, causing swelling to accumulate above the underwear band. This has the potential to aggravate pain or exacerbate the “C-section shelf” or overhang. 

From a perinatal therapist's perspective, swelling accumulation means you're likely to have to do additional scar massaging in that area. From an aesthetic standpoint, chronic swelling accumulation can make a “C-section shelf” more permanent (read: tougher to treat. And yes, it's generally treatable!). 

Natural Fabrics Are Key

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Life After Birth Project (@lifeafterbirth)

The underwear you put on before heading home from the hospital may be different from the underwear that best suits your needs months later — and that's totally normal. 

Generally, my C-section mamas may find that sizing up by one size provides more comfort post-cesarean — especially in the first three months when your body is stretched and swollen from pregnancy (when in doubt, refer to the size chart here).

From day one to week six is when your incision is most vulnerable to infection. To help prevent one, you'll want to opt for comfortable underwear and clothing made of natural fibers. This will feel more breathable and help protect from bacterial and fungal overgrowth post c-section.

Modal cotton is a bio-based fabric made from beech tree cellulose. The cloud-soft material used to make Luxe Modal Leakproof High Rise Underwear, for instance, absorbs light leaks from postpartum bleeding and still looks cute. 

Week six to 12 tends to be a safer time to switch to postpartum panties made using synthetic fabrics, if you'd like. You can opt for everyday underwear or stick to Leakproof options, which may prove useful when your period makes its return. 

To recap: I recommend including high waisted underwear in your pre-packed hospital bag and planning to wear them for the first three months of your recovery. In tandem with daily c-section scar massages and regular movement, your healing body will thank you. 

As always, listen to your body. It will tell you what's most comfortable. 

—

We hope you found this post informative — but remember: we’re not doctors and this post is not medical advice! While all posts are fact-checked and well researched, we always recommend you chat with your doctor about any questions or concerns you might have regarding a medical condition. 

We’re here to support and educate, but never with the aim of disregarding professional medical advice you’ve been given. Phew, now that that’s out of the way, you can go on living unapologetically free.

Exercise during the postpartum period can offer relief for these challenges and allow you to feel stronger and more energized as a new parent. Specifically, strength and mobility exercises can help to increase range of motion, improve posture, and reduce pain and discomfort.

As an occupational therapist and pre- and postnatal trainer, I know just how important movement can be to your physical and mental wellbeing. 

Keep in mind, you should always return to exercise slowly, listen carefully to your body, and consult with your healthcare provider before beginning a new exercise program. 

I’m sharing five exercises you can do from the comfort of home to help support your postnatal recovery. So, put on your favorite activewear set and let's get moving. 

Cat-Cow

The cat-cow exercise can help improve flexibility in your spine, reduce stiffness, and decrease back pain. To do this exercise, start on all fours, with your hands below your shoulders and knees below your hips, hip distance apart. 

Inhale to let your back drop downwards into cow pose, and then exhale and round your spine towards the ceiling into cat pose. Slowly move between the two positions, breathing throughout.

Core Connection Breathwork 

The core connection breath is a foundational movement that can help you reconnect to your deep core and pelvic floor muscles. A strong core contributes to improved posture, improved balance, and decreased risk of injury. 

To do this exercise, lay on your back and, as you breathe in, allow your belly to fill with air, your rib cage to expand, and your pelvic floor muscles to relax completely (this should feel like when you sit on the toilet and release to pee.) 

Then, exhale and engage your pelvic floor muscles (this should feel like stopping a flow of urine), engage your deep core (“belly button to spine”), and allow your rib cage and belly to descend back down. 

Modified Side Plank

The side plank is a more challenging strength exercise that can help build strength across several muscle groups, including your core, glutes, shoulders, and back. Start this exercise by lying on your side, with your bottom knee on the ground and the top leg straight out. 

Inhale, allowing your belly to fill with air and rib cage to expand. On the exhale, lift your hips up off the ground so that your body forms a straight line and your elbow is directly below your shoulder. Hold for five to 10 seconds, keeping your core engaged, and then lower back down. Repeat on the other side.

Hip Flexor Stretch

Stretching your hip flexors is important during the postpartum period to relieve the tightness that often occurs during and after pregnancy. By releasing tension in these muscles, postpartum individuals may improve their flexibility, range of motion, posture, and decrease feelings of straining or pain. 

To do this stretch, position yourself with one knee on the ground and your other leg bent in front of you at 90 degrees. Slowly shift your weight forward until you feel a stretch across the hip of the back leg. Hold this stretch for 20 to 30 seconds and then repeat on the other side. 

Clamshells

Clamshells are an excellent, low-impact exercise for strengthening the gluteal muscles. Building glute strength is important for posture and alignment, injury prevention, decreasing back pain, and mitigating pelvic floor dysfunction. 

Having strong glute muscles can also help support new parents in daily activities, such as lifting and carrying. To do this exercise, start by lying on your side with your legs bent at 90 degrees and feet touching.

Keeping your feet together, lift your top knee up and hold for one to two seconds. Slowly lower your knee back down and repeat 10-15 times on each side. 

Incorporating strength and mobility exercises into your routine can be a great way to improve your overall health as a new parent. These movements can help rebuild muscle strength, improve posture, increase flexibility, decrease pain, and prevent injuries.

Aim to continually increase the difficulty of your postpartum workout plan overtime, in order to keep building strength and improving your overall health.

—

We hope you found this post informative — but remember: we’re not doctors and this post is not medical advice! While all posts are fact-checked and well researched, we always recommend you chat with your doctor about any questions or concerns you might have regarding a medical condition. We’re here to support and educate, but never with the aim of disregarding professional medical advice you’ve been given. Phew, now that that’s out of the way, you can go on living unapologetically free.

For behavioral health scientist and director of maternal health at the Black Women’s Health Imperative (BWHI), Kanika Harris, that means “you have the support to take care of yourself and [your] growing baby,” she says. “It means that whatever brings you joy in this experience of bringing life into the world, you have the right to that.” 

Whether that looks like giving birth at home, being surrounded by friends and family, settling into an intuitive birthing position, or incorporating cultural rituals, there should be space in the birthing experience for autonomy and joy.

Why then, within the current framework, do safety, support, and empowerment remain firmly out of reach for so many burgeoning families? Kanika, who’s policy and birthing justice work champions health equity for Black women, stipulates “I think for us in this country, birth is not feeling safe anymore.” 

It’s a heart wrenching declaration — and one that’s supported by heaps of evidence. Despite the progress being made by BWHI and other birthing justice organizations, the stark reality is that birthing experiences and outcomes vary drastically based on racial identity, income, and social status. 

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Life After Birth Project (@lifeafterbirth)

These inequalities are a driving force in Knix’s decision to join forces with BWHI and to launch and sustain the NOURISH Program, a doula training program designed to meet the intersectional needs of Black birthing families. Taking a grassroots approach, the program is helping push the birthing justice movement forward. 

This movement, as defined by the University of California San Francisco, calls for safeguarding “the rights of birthing people to make decisions around their pregnancies, including seeking abortions, and to have children in safe and supportive environments.” 

It’s a reasonable ask and, yet, Black and LGBTQ2S+ folks, as well as immigrants, those who are low income and not able-bodied face mounting inequality, often struggling to access adequate care. 

The maternal mortality rate among Black birthing people in the U.S. remains disproportionately high, while thousands of others experience unexpected labor and delivery outcomes with complicated health consequences. It’s especially troubling if you consider 80% of pregnancy-related deaths are completely preventable. 

“Every mother, everywhere, regardless of race or background deserves to have a healthy pregnancy and birth,” reads a social post from world class athlete Serena Williams in honor of Black Maternal Health Week. 

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Serena Williams (@serenawilliams)

After welcoming her daughter via emergency C-section, she suffered a pulmonary embolism, among other health complications — an eye opening example of how structural racism and implicit bias can affect even the most privileged women of color. 

As organizations and advocates alike work towards eliminating barriers to health equity for Black women and birthing people, knowledge and education are key to empowering women of color to pursue the best health decisions for themselves. 

This looks like challenging the insidious forces of racism, sexism, and inequality at work within the health and reproductive care system. It also involves restoring knowledge to the Black birthing community by offering person-centered care and support from traditional birth-workers, like midwives and doulas.  

“I think having doulas present is providing continuous support and care, and providing a way for families to feel safe,” says Kanika. “[It’s] so critical that you have someone that’s helping you or providing you support throughout that journey.” 

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by National Black Doulas Asso. ® (@nationalblackdoulas)

To date, the NOURISH program (which is scholarship-based and free of cost) has trained 38 full-spectrum doulas who have gone on to provide 160 Black birthing families with the physical, emotional, and informational support needed to manage the transition into parenthood and the postpartum phase. 

“The NOURISH program really came out of this idea of restoring autonomous communities that understand birth and have that knowledge for them and their families,” says Kanika. 

While the program provides postpartum doulas with the knowledge and resources needed to support birthing families, its grassroots approach also allows women to advocate for themselves, as well as circulate knowledge within their families and communities at large. 

Knix’s donations to the scholarship program have grown to over $200,000 — thanks, in part, to the $1 donations from every item purchased from our Maternity and Postpartum Collection. 

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Life After Birth Project (@lifeafterbirth)

As NOURISH continues to expand, it’s heartening to know that doulas — empowered with knowledge and person-centered care — are transforming the lives of those in their communities. And, in no small way, are driving the birthing justice movement forward by improving the health outcomes of birthing people. 

The crux, however, remains that how women show up to birth is just one component of an overarching system in which social determinants continue to negatively impact women of color on the whole (pregnant or not). 

When the health needs of women of color are being met, “then you don’t have to worry about how pregnant women show up to birth,” according to Kanika. 

“Maternal health is the number one indicator of the health of a nation,” she tells me. “Birthing justice means you have sovereignty and autonomy to live your life on your terms, get all the resources you need to provide for your family, [and to] live out your passions — whatever that means.”

—

We hope you found this post informative — but remember: we’re not doctors and this post is not medical advice! While all posts are fact-checked and well researched, we always recommend you chat with your doctor about any questions or concerns you might have regarding a medical condition. We’re here to support and educate, but never with the aim of disregarding professional medical advice you’ve been given. Phew, now that that’s out of the way, you can go on living unapologetically free.

It's become a particularly sore occasion since my arduous journey of being diagnosed with — and then treated for — endometriosis, coupled with turning 30. 

I'm not a mother, neither am I child-free by choice. I'm undecided; suspended at a crossroads, wavering between two paths. 

If that weren’t daunting enough, there’s the paralysing sense of urgency induced by social pressures. I feel like I have to determine which path to take — now. 

Whether it's doctors who incessantly nudge me to get pregnant or friends and their stories of long and difficult journeys to becoming parents, the weight of making a decision feels inescapable.

And then there's the invisible cloak of society’s expectations resting on my 34-year-old shoulders. Rather than inching towards a chosen path, however, I find myself stuck in the middle, terrified of a misstep. 

I’m afraid of deciding to go in either direction and regretting it. Even worse, I’m scared of taking my partner and family on either of these paths with me and, in the future, being the one to blame when things don’t work out how we imagined they would. 

If that isn’t enough, I’m also uncomfortable being stuck in the middle, angry at myself for being weak and unable to take a stance.

Over the past few years, my unease around the topic of motherhood has grown stronger, triggered by pregnant women and young mothers I see in my day-to-day life. It got to the point that bumping into pregnant friends or ones with babies would make me terribly anxious. 

Once, I even ended up sobbing uncontrollably — I had my PMS to thank for that one. With my mental health deteriorating, I wanted to help myself and see what I could do to lessen my fears. 

Rather than looking ahead to the future, I started by examining my current life. Perhaps, even at this crossroads, there was something to be cultivated?

I realised that there was a quality that motherhood offered, one that wasn’t very present in my life. That quality was nurturing: taking care of somebody or something, and seeing it grow. 

I was enjoying my life and the relationships in it, but that motherly, nurturing energy — which I had heaps of inside me — didn’t have an outlet. I tried releasing it onto my cat, but he wasn't very interested.

What I’ve understood over time, is that I don’t have to wait to become a mother — a huge decision and undertaking — to cultivate more nurturing in my life. I could start exactly where I was, taking care of the present moment, cultivating my life as it was, and embracing the unknown instead of being paralysed by it. 

I started to nurture my relationships more and poured the remaining resources into tending to plants, and myself. Somehow it didn't cross my mind before that I could be the recipient of my own nurturing energy.

At first, I felt stuck in the middle, between trying to become a mother and embracing the decision to be child-free. Over time I’ve learned I can still be undecided while creating space for love, care, and nurturing in my life. 

I also don’t have to wait for my fears and anxiety to disappear. Instead, I can embrace them. That doesn’t mean I’m running high on my attachment to them but, rather, that I can learn to tame them. 

I can be in charge of how I feel, rather than allowing the negative spiral of social pressures and fear rule my thoughts and actions.

That's how I learned to nurture my life in the present moment. I’m confident that by quieting those external voices, I’ll know which one of the contentious paths to choose — eventually. 

But the choice is mine to make. And for now, I’m not going anywhere.

Over the past few years, a shift has taken place: new parents have taken to social media to showcase the realities of the postpartum period, cultural notions of “bouncing back” have become increasingly shunned, and the phase that’s come to be known as the “fourth trimester” is — little by little — becoming demystified. 

Our very own CEO, Joanna Griffiths, even authored Life After Birth in which a tapestry of portraits of early motherhood illustrate what life is really like after birth. While we tend to focus our attention on the arrival of a baby, the book illuminates the transformations that take place during the postnatal period.

In peeling back the layers of this beautiful and raw transition from pregnancy to parenthood, many important gaps have also come to light. The maternal death rate, for one, continues to disproportionally affect Black birthing families — with 52% of maternal deaths occurring postpartum due to lack of postpartum and childcare education. 

Steadily, more and more new parents are calling on the specialized knowledge and care offered by Postpartum Doulas to fill this crucial void. In support of those navigating postpartum journeys, last year we partnered with the Black Women’s Health Imperative to create NOURISH, a Postpartum Doula training program. 

In an effort to quell inflated maternal mortality rates within the Black community, we donated an initial $75,000 in scholarships to support an entire cohort of Doulas. In turn, the program’s first graduating class has gone on to provide free postpartum care to numerous families across North America.

Recently, I caught up with Lydia Harris, an entrepreneur, Birth Doula, and recent NOURISH graduate (among many other endeavours) to learn more about the kind of support Postpartum Doulas are offering growing families. Lydia, who is the founder of the women’s health-focused Labor With Love, opened up about her recent experience as a Postpartum Doula for her cousin (and new mom) Maya Scott-Richardson. 

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Labor With Love | Doula (@labor.with.love)

Chatting together virtually, their love and candor is immediately palpable. In the wake of a traumatic delivery experience followed by a challenging bout of postpartum depression, Maya described the tender care provided by her cousin. “She was very helpful in helping me make sure I’m taking care of myself and making sure that things for the baby were also being taken care of,” she says. “I am forever grateful for that.”

Maya describes the post-birth journey as one in which she and her husband, Kadeem Richardson, had to “gently” learn to care for themselves again. Maya and Kadeem, who are both PhD graduates from the University of Illinois Urbana-Champaign in separate STEM disciplines (Maya specializes in Environmental Health and Data Science and Kadeem specializes in Reproductive Toxicology), navigated post-birth healing and new parenthood in tandem with busy schedules and demanding careers. 

In addition to Kadeem’s full-time research, he’s also a stand-up comedian and the founder of Tafari Men’s Grooming, where he puts his chemistry background to use creating products with Black hair and beards in mind. 

As Lydia so aptly points out, adapting to full-time childcare and life with a busy partner is a transition many new parents have to navigate — especially in this day and age. “I think this new-age balance that must be struck in a world where you have to have multiple jobs in order to survive and thrive is an important piece of this puzzle,” she tells me. 

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Maya Scott-Richardson (@maya_thephenomenalone)

When asked about her journey in becoming a Doula, Lydia describes the experience as “enlightening.” Though she had no prior formal childcare experience, shocked by statistics and health disparity rates, she was called to take on Doula work as a means of improving birth rates and outcomes. 

Her Postpartum Doula designation was the final step in her path to becoming a full-spectrum Doula. Still, there seemed to be an endless number of things to learn. “I walked away from every single training thinking: How in the world have I gone this far in my Doula journey without knowing this?,” she recalls. 

The most important thing she learned throughout the program? You can’t pour from an empty cup. “They offered us training on how to work on ourselves, teaching us tools to heal ourselves and unpack the emotions we experience as Doulas,” she says. “Because how you take care of yourself is going to impact how you take care of others.”

It’s a philosophy Lydia has carried with her through her work, including caring for Maya during her postpartum journey — which involved everything from making meals to caring for her son so Maya and Kadeem could get some much-needed reprieve.

There were instances in which Maya recalls being up with the baby for 72 hours and the relief of having Lydia come by to ensure she was rested and fed. Sometimes, it wasn’t even a matter of Lydia physically being there. “It might be just a text and chat to say, Hey, how’s everything going?”

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Labor With Love | Doula (@labor.with.love)

When the conversation shifts to misconceptions about postnatal care, Maya stresses the importance of creating a supportive environment and how much things can change post-delivery. “You know that you are expecting a baby, but things actually physically change for a lot of people once they have a baby in their hands.” Having a Postpartum Doula around also means that new parents don’t have to rely as heavily on each other.

Lydia, on her end, underlines the distinction between Nannies and Postpartum Doulas. “Both roles are very important and I think it’s important to understand that your job as a Postpartum Doula is not just to hold the baby. Your job is to take care of the birthing person.” The job doesn’t stop at child care, she stipulates. It can involve everything from observing breastfeeding to calling in a lactation consultant, identifying potential hazards in the house, doing housework, and offering emotional support. 

In the future, Lydia also mentions wanting to help clients mobilize their community and network during the fourth trimester. Instead of baby showers or gender reveals, she suggests placing the emphasis on when the baby has actually arrived and new parents need help the most. This could be in the form of a cooked meal or delivery, an offer to clean the house or hold the baby — but everyone should chip in. 

“You really want to help a postpartum mom?,” she says. “Don't bring me a diaper cake. Bring me a pan of lasagna three weeks after I gave birth.”

As I enter my late 30s, the lifestyle I want for myself is becoming more clear. Or, more accurately, I'm becoming more confident about talking about my goals and desires, which don't align with what is traditionally expected of women. 

Through this, I’ve begun to wonder why only certain lifestyles are celebrated and supported. Similarly to those who choose marriage or pregnancy, I want to shout from the rooftops about my choices — because I'm proud and excited about them. 

So, to celebrate the road less traveled, I set up a gift registry for myself.

Choosing Myself

When my partner of five years left so he could have children, it really did feel like I was choosing myself. People have told me that if you’re child-free, you haven't done anything differently, nothing has changed for you, but that's not how it felt for me. It was an active decision, and it wasn’t celebrated.  

People asked, “Are you sure?” Some women told me how brave they thought I was. Some even said they weren’t sure they would have walked away from the relationship, out of fear of the unknown of being child-free. 

Of course, many women choose not to have children, but this decision is seldom seen as something to celebrate loudly — to praise and encourage. Instead of being regarded as an active choice, it’s often thought of as the result of unfortunate circumstances.

When my partner and I separated over our differences about having kids, I had no notion of what life down the road less travelled could look like. I knew I didn't want a life of parenting, but because there are so few examples of what a life without kids can look like, I felt isolated and confused about how to move forward. 

Even though I knew with every fibre of my being that I didn't want to spend my life parenting, I second-guessed my decision because of how strongly societal pressures were impacting me.

Channeling Confusion Into Art

It has been a weird and challenging phase of life, and a struggle to figure out how to move forward without seeing many role models living the life I visualize for myself. Making art about my experience of the world is how I make sense of it, so my gift registry is a part of a larger body of work I’m creating to help me move forward. 

In retrospect, the project started post-separation when I created an art book about cycling across South Korea by myself. It continued with an exhibition and accompanying art book I created in 2002, titled Becoming Not A Mother. 

When you decide not to become a mother there is no word for what you are becoming. But not becoming a parent does not simply mean a continuation of the status quo. The book is an exploration of self care rituals and healing through feelings of loss, alienation, and unworthiness in the wake of my decision to not have children.

The ongoing project also includes a short film I'm currently editing about women travelling alone. I’ve been photographing the gift registry items that people have been sending me, as well as the notes sent along with the gifts. 

I’ve been astounded by the response to the gift registry so far. I’ve received gifts and notes from some of the closest people in my life, and also from complete strangers. The gifts are fun and amazing, of course, but the notes that come with them are the real gifts. 

I'm encouraged that I'm not the only one who thinks it’s important to loudly and publicly celebrate women for more than getting married and having babies. 

Words Carry Weight

Among the notes I’ve received, here are a few that have resonated.

"Hi Jackie. I wish I could find the words to tell you how deeply this project resonates with me. When things get tough, remember that choosing yourself and living your truth will never lead you astray. Much love."

"Wonderful Idea! So happy to support – with chocolate! My own path to motherhood was unplanned and tough. Fully appreciate and celebrate other options and choices. Wish you all the best in this beautiful, hard life!"

"Jackie – Congratulations on this next phase of your life – full of art, travel, beauty and joy, and a renewed commitment to the life you want and deserve :) Love, a fellow bad binch!"

Jackie Dives is a photojournalist and artist based in Vancouver.

For perinatal therapist Janette Yee, birthing people are akin to athletes who have trained for a marathon and suffered injury. Her job, she posits, is to get you back in the game. Post-cesarean, that looks like adopting self-care rituals that will support healing and allow full recovery. 

“When a baby is born, a mother is also born,” says Janette. “I don’t know that many women take a moment to pause and reflect on the magnitude of that brand new identity.” North American culture often prizes a “do it all on your own” approach when, in reality, motherhood wasn’t meant to be done alone. 

When asked why self-care is so important post C-birth, she tells me “self-care is accessible 24-7.” While working with a perinatal therapist post-cesarean is a must, most people can see their therapists only once every few weeks. Self-care, meanwhile, is available to new parents at all times.

Ahead, Janette helps us break down the physical and mental pillars of C-birth recovery and rehabilitation.

Rest and Restoration

“Human beings get stronger, not when we exercise, but when we sleep,” says Janette. “Exercise is merely the stimulus to break down the body so when we give the body an opportunity to rest, we actually get stronger.”

New moms and parents may, rightly, feel their weakest post-birth. Here, Janette’s sports analogy is poignant. After a season-ending injury, the reflex is to provide athletes with as much uninterrupted rest and healthy foods as possible — the same applies to recovering moms. 

Of course, for new parents, seven hours of uninterrupted sleep may be nearly impossible. That’s when a support network of loved ones can play their part in helping new parents get as many hours of sleep as possible, even if it’s broken up into short naps. 

“You can do all the rehab prescribed, take all the programs, and hire the best personal trainers, but none of it will help as much as putting sleep first,” says Janette.

Find Support 

It’s easy to prescribe sleep, but entirely different to make it happen in practice — especially with a fussy newborn on your hip. That’s why Janette invites her clients to think outside the box when it comes to navigating those early days of finding rest. 

According to her, even just a 15 minute power nap can clear your brain of debris, allowing healing to take place in small increments. She encourages new parents to call on their neighbors, friends, and family members to take small shifts with the baby. 

Resist the urge to go at it alone by tapping into your community. If your network is sparse, local groups designed for new parents can help you cultivate one. Being a parent truly does take a village (and for good reason). 

Brace Yourself

“Protection when it comes to cesarean births includes things like bracing,” says Janette. She draws parallels between the compression you need with a sprained ankle. But, in this case, the brace looks like an ab wrap or compression garment.

There are many cultural iterations of these ab wraps or they can come in the form of compression garments, like Knix’s CoreLove Underwear or High Rise Leggings and Leakproof Underwear, which also offer pelvic floor support. This will help with swelling pain and protect your incision for the first six weeks post-cesarean. 

During this phase, you’ll want the surgical area to be covered and compressed. After six weeks, you can begin to slowly wean yourself off your brace until basic core retraining and strength has been achieved.

Modified Movement 

Gentle movement is also key to recovering from a C-birth as it reduces inflammation, increases circulation, and improves long term mobility. Walking, according to Janette, is one of the best forms of exercise you can do after giving birth, whether it be vaginal or cesarean. 

Pain is also to be expected post-cesarean and too much movement can just amplify the agony. That’s where “modified movement” comes into play. During the first six weeks, “Do your best to get swelling out of the surgical area,” says Janette. “Swelling prevents healing.” 

When you’re in pain, your inclination may be to sit still or become rigid. Small movements, like walking around your home and moving your arms up and down will help decrease swelling. The other big reason movement is important is that it reconnects your brain to the wounded area.

Nerve endings have been cut and need to be re-tethered. “The more you move, the more blood flow goes to that area,” says Janette. “The more the nerves reconnect, the more you gain core control.” This is part of what Janette refers to as the three R’s: Re-activation, Re-patterning, and Re-strengthening. Everyone moves through these phases at different intervals, with “re-patterning” being the most intensive. 

Gentle Massage 

Janette also emphasizes the importance of indirect scar massage which can help increase blood flow during the first six weeks of recovery. Gentle movement, like walking, taking deep belly breaths, and opening up your arms and bringing them above your head is sufficient to create movement around the wounded area during this phase. “This opens up that front body and starts to move that surgical area into positions that you want it to be opened into,” she says.

After six weeks, you’ll want to begin incorporating a few minutes of direct massage and movement into your daily self-care routine. Doing this alone will “exponentially” improve recovery, according to Janette. 

When it comes to scar massages, “you start superficial before you go deep,” she says. You can start by lightly tapping on the area around the scar to help nerve regeneration — AKA that mind-body connection we mentioned earlier. You can apply the same technique with small circles, starting in the peripherals of the scar and working your way closer over the course of days and weeks. 

This should feel intuitive and never painful — “you always keep to zero out of 10 on the pain scale.” As your body heals, you should be able to deepen those taps and widen those circles safely. 

“I think women need to know that they know their body best,” says Janette. As a perinatal therapist, she’s there to show you healing techniques you can incorporate into your C-birth self-care routine. But, when in doubt, you know your body best. 

For many women, creating, birthing, and healing is their birthright. “We are mother nature and intuitive like mother nature, she knows how to heal.” 

—

We hope you found this post informative — but remember: we’re not doctors and this post is not medical advice! While all posts are fact-checked and well researched, we always recommend you chat with your doctor about any questions or concerns you might have regarding a medical condition. We’re here to support and educate, but never with the aim of disregarding professional medical advice you’ve been given. Phew, now that that’s out of the way, you can go on living unapologetically free.

Perinatal therapist Janette Yee got her start working with elite athletes. Though, in many ways, she contends that working with birthing people is no different. “Mothers are the greatest athletes of all time,” she says. “Pregnancy is an ultramarathon. Childbirth is a sports injury.” 

It’s an empowering approach she applies directly to expecting and new parents, whom she refers to as athletes. Her physical therapy practice also works to destigmatize cesarean births, which are often portrayed as “less natural” than vaginal births. 

“I really want women to know that they have grown a human up until that very point and, with assistance, birthed a human as well,” she tells me. “I want women to just pause and celebrate that.”

In part one of our C-birth series, Janette takes us through the various ways one can prepare for a cesarean. “Even when we’re planning for a C-birth, we don’t always know what that entails,” she cautions. That’s because doctors may not have the time to go into exhaustive detail about what to expect when the curtain goes up — and beyond.

In Janette’s own words, you may be left feeling like, “what the hell just happened to me?” Whether you’re planning for an upcoming C-birth or want to be ready in the event of an emergency cesarean, here’s what you need to know. 

Manage Fear

As you approach your due date, it’s normal to feel anxious. Fear can be a powerful force leading up to and during your C-birth, but there are some techniques you can integrate into your day-to-day pre-cesarean to mitigate unease. 

For one, you can practice transforming anxious thoughts into positive anticipation. On a cognitive level, practicing breathwork and gentle movement can help relax and reframe feelings of alarm. 

Like any major surgery, it can be useful to mentally prepare for the pain you’re likely to experience in the aftermath, but it’s equally important to remind yourself that you can handle it. Recovery is part of any birthing experience, but our bodies have an innate capacity for healing. 

Protect Your Immune System 

According to Janette, one thing you may not have considered in the lead up to your C-birth is how crucial it is to safeguard your immune system. “The last thing you want post-cesarean, when you have stitches and a vulnerable mid-section, is to be sneezing and coughing,” she says. 

In addition to insisting that all visitors wash their hands, you may want to limit visitors altogether in your final trimester and for the first six weeks after birthing. As you plan for a smooth recovery post-surgery, do your healing abdominals a favor and avoid getting sick.

Expect a Longer Recovery

Having a C-birth means you likely won’t have to deal with vaginal tears or bladder issues, but you may have to navigate a lengthier recovery process. As the incision heals, soft tissue  that have been cut will  be painful and reduce your mobility for the first few weeks. 

Of course, managing your recovery in tandem with caring for your newborn can be challenging. Do what you can to manage your pain. There’s no pride in “sucking it up,” says Janette. “Take your prescribed pain medication or alternative, and ice the area as needed.”

Otherwise, find comfort in knowing your incision will feel much better within a few weeks. Preparation is key (more on that ahead) and so is patience with your healing body. 

Make a Recovery Plan 

Having a cesarean recovery plan will ensure a smooth recovery and put your mind at ease ahead of your delivery. Rehabilitation involves lots of rest, especially during the first six weeks. Do what you can to avoid housework and physical chores; delegate where possible. 

This means you’ll want to establish your support network ahead of time to ensure you have the foundation and resources to focus on recovery during this early period. In addition to lots of sleep, practicing deep breaths will lay the groundwork for reconnecting with your abdominal muscles and help with healing and relaxation. 

Preventing infection is just as important, so ensure you have bracing or compression garments to protect your incision. Within six weeks, also consider booking your first perinatal therapy session for expert guidance in your rehabilitation journey.

Here, you’ll learn important techniques for reinforcing the mind-body connection, safeguarding your health, massaging your incision, and, eventually, restrengthening your abdomen. For more on how to cultivate a self-care routine post-cesarean, turn to part two of our C-birth series. 

Call on Your Support Network 

Rest, nutrients, and gentle movement are of vital importance to your C-birth recovery — but they’re no simple feat when you’re navigating the ups and downs of early parenthood. For this reason, Janette can’t overemphasize the value of setting up your support network.

Motherhood wasn’t meant to be done alone, she underscores. Your support system are the people who will ensure you fulfill these basic — but essential — every day necessities for healing.

—

We hope you found this post informative — but remember: we’re not doctors and this post is not medical advice! While all posts are fact-checked and well researched, we always recommend you chat with your doctor about any questions or concerns you might have regarding a medical condition. We’re here to support and educate, but never with the aim of disregarding professional medical advice you’ve been given. Phew, now that that’s out of the way, you can go on living unapologetically free.

“It’s really important to exercise in a way that supports your body and all the changes that are occurring in order to maintain your strength and prevent any injuries,” says personal trainer and occupational therapist Jenni Diamond. Using evidence-based programs, Jenni specializes in helping expectant and new parents exercise safely both during and after pregnancy. 

Ahead, she takes us through everything you need to know about breaking a sweat during the magical — but, sometimes, arduous — pregnancy and postpartum period. 

There Are Tons of Benefits

If you’re expecting, the notion of exercising might seem daunting — but “research evidence we have right now says it’s actually part of a healthy pregnancy to engage in physical activity,” says Jenni. Unless you've been told by your treating healthcare provider to avoid exercise, there are tons of benefits to moving safely.

According to Jenni, engaging in physical activity throughout pregnancy can decrease the risk of depression by 25%. Your chances of developing gestational diabetes, high blood pressure, and preeclampsia can also decrease by up to 40%.

There are also the benefits of increased energy levels and decreased back pain. “Doing evidence-based pregnancy workouts can even help with labor and delivery by learning proper cueing and how to activate your muscles,” says Jenni. 

Avoid Injuries and Strains

As your body grows and changes, you may be at increased risk of strains and sprains. Added pressure to your pelvic floor can also lead to pelvic dysfunction and bladder leaks, which can be heightened by certain forms of movement. 

Even daily routines, including lifting things in your day-to-day, can exacerbate pelvic and intra-abdominal pressure. The key is using proper form, connecting to your muscles as you move, and staying comfortably within your body's limits.

Know What's Safe

There are certain forms of exercise to avoid during pregnancy — and among them are anything with rapid changes in direction or excessively hot climates. In addition to passing on hot yoga, anything with a risk of falling — like skiing or horseback riding — should also be off the table. 

Exercising on your back is generally fine, according to Jenni, but if you start to feel unwell it may be due to a lack of blood flow, in which case, you’ll want to promptly shift positions. When it comes to intensity levels, Jenni suggests keeping things moderate. 

"She recommends using the “talk test” to ensure you’re not working out too vigorously. “You should be able to have a conversation,” says Jenni. “That’s a good indicator of what would be considered a reasonably safe exercise intensity." For those who want to exercise at a more vigorous intensity level, she recommends speaking to your treating healthcare provider to discuss whether it's safe for you.

Adapt Your Fitness Routine

When it comes to exercising during pregnancy or postpartum, what it ultimately comes down to is what feels best for your body. “If it doesn’t feel right, don’t do it,” says Jenni.

Bladder leaks, for instance, could be a sign that you’re putting too much pressure on your pelvic floor. While Leakproof Activewear and Underwear can help manage these symptoms, seeing a pelvic physiotherapist will help mitigate the root cause. 

Adapting your current routine to avoid pelvic pressure or general strain could be as simple as lessening your weight load — or doing away with weights altogether. “If jump squats aren’t feeling right, you can modify by doing regular squats,” says Jenni. Listening to your body during pregnancy and postpartum is a good way to test your limits and scale back if needed. 

Ease Back Into Postpartum Movement

Getting back into your fitness routine postpartum might be the last thing on your list of priorities. Between the sleepless nights and days filled with trying to keep a brand new human alive, it makes complete sense. Jenni recommends keeping in mind that any movement is good movement. “Going for a walk and seeing how your body responds is a great starting point early on.”

If you’re dealing with postpartum incontinence — which is extremely common — consider making an appointment with a physical therapist for customized pelvic floor exercises. Otherwise, Jenni suggests easing back into a movement routine with strength and mobility exercises. 

Hip flexor stretches can help alleviate any tightness that's accumulated during pregnancy, labor, and delivery. Starting with one knee down to the ground and one leg stretched in front of you, you can lean forward for a much-needed stretch. 

All in all, patience with your ever-changing body is key. “Just keep building,” says Jenni. “Slowly add intensity to your routine in order to build strength and prevent injury.”

—

We hope you found this post informative — but remember: we’re not doctors and this post is not medical advice! While all posts are fact-checked and well researched, we always recommend you chat with your doctor about any questions or concerns you might have regarding a medical condition. We’re here to support and educate, but never with the aim of disregarding professional medical advice you’ve been given. Phew, now that that’s out of the way, you can go on living unapologetically free.

For birth photographer, Carmen Bridgewater, it's about transforming a potentially traumatic moment into a beautiful one. Beyond the daunting task of capturing these sacred moments of birth — and producing images that will be cherished for a lifetime — their work serves a greater purpose. Their lens is also used to educate, empower, and subvert.

Scrolling through their Instagram feed for the first time, we were taken aback by the raw and candid essence of their process — we couldn't wait to get into the nitty-gritty of what it's like to be a birth photographer.

As a photographer, what drew you to capturing birthing experiences?

(Image by Carmen Bridgewater, who is wearing the BlissFit Leakproof Nursing Bra and Cotton Super Leakproof Boxer Brief)

My photography has always followed the natural ebb and flow of my personal life. While in college, I shot many graduation portraits. After I graduated and got married, I shot many weddings and engagement photos. A few years before getting pregnant and giving birth to my own child, I felt a pull towards motherhood portraits and the genre of birth photography. 

As any Google search rabbit hole begins, researching birth photography led me to the treacherous statistics that face Black birthing and postpartum people. I went through the usual grieving process, first becoming sad, then angry, and then earnestly wanting to be a part of the solution.

I noticed that it was hard to find positive images of Black people birthing and there were very few Black photographers in the birth genre. I wanted to use photography to show Black people that they have options and can be the author of their own birth stories. 

The work you do is so vital in demystifying birthing journeys. How does it feel to be part of these raw and intimate moments?

Sometimes I am documenting a moment so intimate and so emotion-filled, I feel like I shouldn’t be in the room. On the other hand, I think about what makes this work so invaluable. I am invited into these birth spaces to capture the moments otherwise left unseen — to bear witness to the magic and miracles.

"I wanted to use photography to show Black people that they have options and can be the author of their own birth stories."

With every birth I capture, I am reminded of the amount of trust placed in me to not just capture pictures but to tell a full story of pain, perseverance, triumph, and then joy. 

What have you learned from your work as a birth photographer?

(Image by Carmen Bridgewater, who is wearing the BlissFit Leakproof Nursing Bra and Cotton Super Leakproof Boxer Brief)

Living, breathing, and creating in this space has opened my eyes to the beauty of informed decision-making in birth and I am more eager than ever for all Black birthing people to experience its joys. 

I have attended births where the birthing person did not take a childbirth education class or hire a doula and didn’t fully understand their rights. As a result, their experiences left them with many scars, physically and emotionally.

I have learned that through photography, I can essentially educate people about their birthing options. A lot of people who follow me on social media (initially) don’t know what water birth is or what roles doulas and midwives play. Photography is, if nothing else, a conversation starter. 

Do you think photography can empower birthing people to cultivate their own unique birthing experiences?

I do! When Black people see themselves represented in beautiful birth imagery, they are able to close their eyes and place themselves there — in a safe space where they are surrounded by support and genuine care. 

They begin to read and ask questions about how they, too, can have a peaceful, trauma-free experience. Our bodies have been birthing babies since the beginning of time and, sometimes, we forget what miracles they can perform — largely without the help of modern medicine. My work brings people back to that reality. It is my activism.

How do certain implicit biases disproportionately affect Black birthing people and families?

(Image by Carmen Bridgewater, who is wearing the BlissFit Leakproof Nursing Bra and Cotton Super Leakproof Boxer Brief)

Back in 2019, I was 7 months pregnant on a trip to the mall to find some maternity clothes to fit my ever-growing body. As I walked up to the door, I saw a white man was holding the door for his family. When I reached the door, he dropped the door on me as I was about to walk through it. 

I don’t believe that he meant harm. I actually think it’s more about what he didn’t think. He didn’t think I needed someone to hold the door for me. As we know, Black women are plagued with the “strong Black women” schema and it doesn’t just go away when we are pregnant. 

Because of implicit bias, non-Black people have trouble empathizing with us, and that carries over directly into our birthing experiences — from our prenatal appointments to our postpartum care. This phenomenon is further amplified for those of us who have more fat on our bodies and those with disabilities.

"My work brings people back to that reality. It is my activism."

Imagery is so powerful and has the magic to induce all sorts of feelings: empathy, compassion, and understanding just to name a few. What I love about birth photography is that it gives us a non-invasive peek into a sacred space we would otherwise not ever enter. I do not do this work to end or address racism, I do this work for my clients. 

However, it’s a bonus to know that my work could have the power to change the hearts of non-POC as well. Imagine what a different world we would live in if we were able to really see each other as complex beings?

As a new mom (congrats!), how would you describe your own personal birthing journey?

(Image by Carmen Bridgewater, who is wearing the BlissFit Leakproof Nursing Bra and Cotton Super Leakproof Boxer Brief)

My birthing experience was rich! As a birth-worker, I had to make the decision to leave all that I had ever witnessed at other births at the door and have my own experience. I planned my birth like a vacation. 

I wanted to give birth in a beautiful location so I toured birth centres and met with their midwives. I wanted my loved ones with me so I picked a team of my immediate family members to support me and assigned each one a role. I even decided what yummy meal I wanted to eat after and had my dad pick it up after the baby made her debut. 

I labored for about 7 hours before giving birth in the water to a seven-pound baby. Having my birth portraits to look back on was so healing and such a beautiful way to make peace with my journey to motherhood: the good, the bad, and the glorious.

Carmen Bridgewater is a photographer, videographer, and birth-worker based in Fort Worth

My plan was to compete at the Games and see how I felt after a healthy break from rowing. At 28-years-old, with a graduate degree and a partner of eight years, there was a lot to think about. Should I come back and try for another Olympics? Should I pursue a career and save for a house? When do I want to have children?

Now, almost five months later, I have begun training for the next Olympics — I want to chase my childhood dream of standing on the podium one last time. And, as a woman, I find the questions I face around this decision are focused on my role as a prospective mother.

What about children? Are you going to have kids right after the next Olympics? How will you save enough to support a family? I see many of my teammates facing the same questions — and for those who are older, the decision has been hastened by the biological clock ticking in the background.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Jill Moffatt (@jillmoffatt)

Now more than ever, coming back to sport after having children is a reality for many athletes — and many are competing at the highest level. At every Olympics, there are many mothers who compete, and although this won’t be how my story ends, I became interested in hearing from these athletes and learning about their experiences.

When I began interviewing athletes and researchers who focus on women athletes returning to sport post-pregnancy, what surprised me was the lack of guidelines and scientific research. With all these moms returning to training, I figured there must be some clear rules to follow.

What I learned is that many of these women are forging their own paths, with the help of family, their family doctor, and support from teammates.

The Pressure to ‘Bounce Back’

“I think with pregnancies and having babies, there's just that expectation or need to prove to everybody how quickly you can bounce back. Whether you're coming back to sport or not. I think it's something a lot of women try to do, to be able to say oh, well, I lost all the baby weight this fast, or, oh, well, I came back to sport within six weeks,” says two-time Olympic gold-medallist, Meaghan Mikkelson.

Mikkelson knows a thing or two about ‘bouncing back’ after having children — she has returned to sport twice after giving birth, once following the Sochi Olympics, and again after the Olympics in Pyeongchang.

But it’s not as simple as giving birth, throwing on your runners, and beginning to train again. Anyone who has gone through labor can tell you that — yet the research and guidance on how to return to elite activity postpartum is inadequate.

“The interesting thing about pregnancy and postpartum, especially with elite athletes, is that we don't even have good evidence-based recommendations in terms of what is most appropriate,” said Dr. McHugh and Dr. Davenport from the University of Alberta, whose research focuses on women returning to sport post-pregnancy.

For athletes, whose careers depend on a deep understanding of their bodies, many find themselves in unchartered territory — navigating recovery and returning to training with minimal research to support their comeback, alongside a body that doesn’t function the way it did pre-pregnancy.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Kimberley Gaucher (@kgaucher)

“I think as an athlete, you're so used to doing something to your body. When you recover, you're like, I acknowledge the damage I've done — because I did it to my body and therefore, I must recover,” says Olympic rowing silver medallist Lindsay Jennerich. “But with pregnancy, it’s different — it's happening to me. Therefore, there's nothing to recover from because I didn't make a physical choice to damage myself. Ultimately, I'm underestimating that trauma on my body.”

Underestimating the physical trauma of giving birth is a position that many athletes find themselves in. “Our reviews were showing that postpartum individuals were actually coming back very early. Some are coming back a week after delivery, six weeks after delivery, and doing around 64 kilometers of running a week,” said McHugh and Davenport.

Kim Gaucher, who has been on the Canadian women’s basketball team since 2001, became pregnant a year out from the Tokyo Olympics — which gave her a limited window of time to recover and then try out for the Olympic team.

At 10 weeks postpartum she joined Team Canada camps and slowly worked her way back to full health, making the Olympic team and being named as team captain.

“It's so hard because you look at your body, and you're like, okay, it's amazing what you've been able to do, like, you birthed a human, that's exceptional. But then at the same time, when you're a high-performance athlete, you're so used to your body doing what you've trained basically your whole life to do. It just doesn't respond in the same way,” says Gaucher.

“You're like, I know I have to give it time. I know that it'll get there. But it's just so frustrating that it's not there now.”

Injuries From Coming Back Quickly

Like Gaucher, Mikkelson knows what it’s like to come back with such a short timeline. When Mikkelson returned to hockey after having her first child, she was trying out for Team Canada’s World Championship team — only four months postpartum.

“It actually ended up having one of the best camps of my career. And I think it's all the blur of being a new mom, I was still breastfeeding, my son was four months old, he was at the camp with me, up in the middle of the night, feeding him running back and forth from the rink to the hotel. So, I really didn't have a lot of time to think about being nervous,” says Mikkelson.

Many women report feeling physically able to begin training soon after giving birth. But one of the prevailing issues that new mothers face is, despite how they’re feeling, their bodies have changed and that requires a different level of care than pre-pregnancy — and without proper guidelines, many find themselves on the brink of injury.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Ｍｅａｇｈａｎ Ｍｉｋｋｅｌｓｏｎ (@mikkelson12)

After Mikkelson made the team, she competed at the World Championships two months later, but injuries caught up with her. “At the World Championships, I was double groin wrapped. I had bursitis in my shoulder. I had tendinitis in my wrist, I was a mess. I was pulling my groin and throwing out my back, left, right, and center,” said Mikkelson.

When Mikkelson had her second child, she had a different experience. “I had a lot more time to come back after I had my daughter. I didn't have to be at camp until she was nine months old. I gave myself time, or my body, the time to heal. And I gave myself more time to come back. I had no injuries.”

Mikkelson’s two different experiences reflect what is now seen in the research, waiting longer to return can enhance your body’s ability to adapt under the stresses of activity. With more research being done on women returning to elite sport postpartum, athletes will soon have access to research-based guidelines that are more suitable — and sports organizations can learn from this research to better support athletes in returning to sport cautiously.

Looking Ahead

Although my story won’t end with an Olympic gold medal and a child — Jennerich assures me that when my time comes, I’ll be ready.

“The difference between training and having a child, is that your body is geared towards supporting you — your strength, your mentality, your focus, everything just takes over and it works in your favor,” says Jennerich.

Olympian Rower, Jill Moffatt, and teammate Jennifer Casson

And while the women I interviewed recalled the pressure to return and injures they endured, they also told beautiful stories of what it is like to be a mother and an athlete. They see themselves as any other working mother — but to me, they are much more than that. They are showing the world that a women’s athletic career is not defined by her womb, that women can do both.

And with researchers like McHugh and Davenport working in the background to help provide better research and resources for athletes, I feel confident that the future for women in sport is looking brighter.

Through the NOURISH Community Doula Training program, 20 Postpartum Doulas will be trained with certifications provided by the National Black Doula Association. The new program created by Knix and BWHI is called NOURISH for an important reason— it stands for New Opportunity to Uncover our Resources, Intuition, Spirit and Healing. And we’re so proud to be a part of this incredibly necessary program. 

Through our Life After Birth Project, we’ve continually committed to fostering community and building support for people navigating their postpartum journeys. But now more than ever, Black women experience limited in-person prenatal care, less support during labor, and more postpartum social isolation during their “Fourth Trimester”. Black birthing parents are less likely to be screened for postpartum depression, which makes this an especially vulnerable time. However, studies have shown that support from a doula can improve the chances of healthy birth outcomes and reduce maternal mortality. 

We’re so thankful we got to chat with BWHI’s Director of Maternal Health, Kanika A. Harris, PhD, MPH all about NOURISH, the importance of supporting Black birth workers, what kind of care Postpartum Doulas provide and why BWHI is asking the question— how do we get Black moms supported and listened to?

Meet Kanika and the Black Women’s Health Imperative. 

Hi Kanika, tell us a bit about BWHI and your role as Director of Maternal Health at BWHI.

BWHI has been around since 1983, started by Byllye Avery. It really started out of the need for reproductive justice and the need for Black women to have the necessary resources to support themselves and have access to healthy choices throughout their lives. 

One of the first things Byllye Avery did was start a gynaecological care centre in Gainesville, Florida in response to a failed petition to get a Planned Parenthood clinic in their community. So they were like, okay, we will make this happen for ourselves. And that’s been the mission of BWHI after all these years: to really support the physical, emotional, financial, and mental needs of Black women nationally across the US. And to make sure we are speaking to the lived experiences of Black women. 

I live and breathe maternal health. It’s what I do in my spare time, it’s what I do in my life— I’m the mom of 3 year old twins and an 8 year old son. I’m a near-miss survivor and a survivor of postpartum depression. And I am also a certified birth doula! I bring all those lived experiences to the table, along with the research and advocacy side of things. 

Why is postpartum care especially important for the Black community? 

When we’re talking about maternal mortality, we’re talking about deaths that happen up to one year after delivery. Sometimes a lot of people think maternal mortality means you’re dying during childbirth. That’s part of it, it accounts for about a third of deaths. But about one third of deaths also happen one week to one year postpartum. 

That postpartum period is overlooked. We call it the “Fourth Trimester” and it’s important in terms of postpartum depression. Postpartum depression can change the trajectory of a woman's life if it’s not treated. It can be a chronic situation for the mom and the family, and it can transform into other issues. 

Especially during COVID— moms are isolated. They don’t have family coming to help because of safety, especially grandparents, and that level of isolation when you have a new baby is just not good.  

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by BWHI (@blkwomenshealth)

What kind of support does a postpartum doula provide? 

 They offer informational support, emotional support. There’s tangible support too— like helping around the house. Helping with a bit of tidying, helping to hold the baby while mom sleeps, helping the birth parent with feeding. Especially helping mom and baby bond and helping the family adjust to a new baby. Physically healing from delivery, talking through healing meals and nutrition. Helping the parents work through any issues postpartum. Maybe mom isn’t feeling well and she’s dismissing it. Postpartum doulas will help to advocate and help her speak up, or help her recognize if she needs a doctor’s visit sooner rather than later. Those are critical points where you can save a mom’s life. 

Living in the United States we have this idea that strength comes from figuring it out alone and by yourself. We put that on moms too. But no one in the world births in isolation. Birthing children and having children builds community. So we want to support building a community. Having help or getting a postpartum doula is not a sign of weakness, or that you’re doing anything wrong. This is what you’re supposed to have.  

What are some of the biggest issues Black women face when it comes to maternal health right now? How has COVID-19 played a role?

The issues Black women face when it comes to maternal health have spanned over decades. We have research to prove that education and income are not necessarily protective factors against maternal mortality or poor birth outcomes. Black women and birthing people are bearing the brunt of the maternal health crisis in the United States. The United States has the worst maternal health outcomes out of all developed nations.

Most of this is stemmed from the stress Black women experience in terms of racism in this country. And the reason it spans across socio-economic status is because you can be a Black lawyer— but the stress of becoming a lawyer and the stress of being the only person of color in the room is a lot. Those experiences of isolation, those stressors can lead to high risk pregnancies. 

On the flip side, there’s the stress of not having your basic needs met. Living in poverty, not having access to quality food or quality healthcare, environmental issues, poor air quality— these all contribute to high risk pregnancies. So we’re seeing it on both ends. 

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by BWHI (@blkwomenshealth)

And then, just living in a country that doesn’t affirm who you are as a human being. Not seeing yourself represented. Seeing things like the George Floyd trial, the narrative of race and the devaluation of Black women— we’re experiencing situations where we’re not listened to, where we’re not believed, our pains and concerns are not taken seriously. And so when you’re talking about a life or death situation, we’re not making the cut. 

COVID-19 has really unveiled and lifted this cloak when it comes to maternal care, because you’re seeing now that mothers are getting even less maternal care. It’s been a situation where we’re losing moms during COVID because they have even less support. It amplified the need for doulas, amplified the need for better support and care, and has made us ask— how do we get moms heard and listened to? 

Why is it especially important to support Black birth workers? 

Health care providers are trained by a culture of gynaecological care that was built off of Black women’s bodies. Literally torturing Black women’s bodies. When you think of that level of disrespect from the founding fathers of gynaecological care in America, it’s so deep rooted in terms of how we’re trained to this day. 

There are levels of bias that we just can’t be aware of because of how we’re conditioned from the time we’re born. It’s so important to have more Black researchers, more Black doctors, more Black doulas that can advocate and ask the right questions— ask the questions we’re not thinking of as patients, listen to us and recognize cues. Having the representation in hospitals is a life or death issue right now. 

What are your hopes for the future of maternal health?

I always tear up when someone asks me this question. My hope is that my daughter is heard and listened to, that she lives in a space that affirms who she is and who she wants to be. That she lives in a space that is unburdened so she can birth a family and feel supported and she’s healthy. That her identity and her culture within that space of birth is heard and not questioned. She doesn’t have to walk into this process from a space of fear, a space of having to fight. A space where she will be getting sacred, respectful care. 

Click here to learn more about BWHI, and visit our Postpartum and Maternity Collection to help support NOURISH. 

A month after becoming ill with COVID-19 in March of 2020, I found out I was expecting my miracle baby, Wilder. Being amid a pandemic while also recovering physically, mentally, and emotionally, my support system was extremely limited and looked very different from what I had always imagined it would. This also meant attending all of my medical appointments and emergency room visits (a total of five during my pregnancy) alone — something that has continued into my postpartum journey.

Struggling to Self-Care Post-Pregnancy 

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Danny Wakefield (@dannythetransdad)

I didn’t spend a great deal of time and energy thinking about what my postpartum experience would look like. And as someone who has struggled with depression and anxiety all of their life, I wish I could have prepared myself with more education and support in my after-birth experience. Due to the pandemic, I didn’t have a postpartum doula or any in-home support after my parents left, which was exactly two weeks after Wilder was born.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I absolutely had people offering their services and support, but the severe anxiety I felt around the idea of someone else coming into my home was so profound that it prevented me from accessing it. This is something I continue to struggle with to this day. 

I wholeheartedly believe that my career as a nanny, degree in child development, and experience as a family and household manager has allowed me to survive my first year of parenthood without in-person support. 

It’s OK To Be a Different Parent Than You Imagined

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Danny Wakefield (@dannythetransdad)

Caring for other people’s babies has been very different than caring for my own — in ways that I didn’t quite expect. For example, I've helped many families sleep train their babies. Prior to giving birth, I had multiple cribs and a nursery decorated specially for Wilder. And wouldn’t you know, my baby has slept on my chest or in my arms every single night and nap of their life, aside from in the car. Not only that, but safely co-sleeping has become one of my absolute favorite parts of parenting. 

My postpartum journey has already taught me how important flexibility is, as well as how important it is to try new things when something isn’t working. I had ideas and expectations around how I was going to parent and, in many ways, how I actually parent is totally different. And that’s OK! 

Letting Go of the Pregnancy Glow

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Danny Wakefield (@dannythetransdad)

Pregnancy and giving birth was a spiritual experience that fostered more self-love than I had ever dreamed possible, especially as a trans person. There has been a great deal of grief in losing that magical connection I had with my body while pregnant. 

Don’t get me wrong, I deeply love my body today, but we are still getting used to this new way of living in the world together. 

Images of transmasculine postpartum (or pregnant) bodies are not as readily available as many other postpartum bodies. There aren't as many written experiences to help find connection, which is why I show up and share my joys and challenges as both a trans person, as well as a single, first-time parent during a pandemic.

Finding Love For an Ever-Changing and Healing Body

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Danny Wakefield (@dannythetransdad)

Now, I’m navigating my way through postpartum hormones, while also balancing beginning testosterone hormone replacement therapy for a second time since giving birth. Many trans birthing people who start hormones again after giving birth typically do so around three months postpartum. 

As a recovering addict navigating early recovery — in addition to postpartum depression and anxiety — I decided to wait until I was six months postpartum before trying to go back on testosterone. What I quickly found was that it increased my anxiety, depression, and irritability while decreasing my patience, which — as a single parent living in the woods alone with no support — was a red flag.

After being back on hormones for a month, I was faced with a decision: did I want to feel more OK in my body and stay on hormones, or stop and feel more OK mentally and emotionally? I made the decision to stop hormones. Although I still experience a great deal of body dysphoria due to being off of them, I feel much better mentally, emotionally, and spiritually — allowing me to show up as the best parent possible. 

I’ll try starting hormones again one day when I have more support in place, but until then I’m staying put in this body of mine and leaning into the love pregnancy taught me.

A Challenging (But Incredibly Rewarding) Adventure

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Danny Wakefield (@dannythetransdad)

I thought pregnancy and giving birth was going to be the hardest part of becoming a new parent, but I was wrong. This first year since giving birth has absolutely knocked me down, squished any ego left in me, picked me back up, brushed me off, and shown me more joy than I could have ever imagined. 

I’ve done so many hard things in my life and becoming a parent is absolutely one of them. Becoming a parent has also been one of the most sacred, spiritual experiences I’ve ever embarked on. 

This past year, even in the struggle, has been the brightest time of my life.

Content Warning: This article mentions sexual violence.

100% of Knix and Carriage House Birth’s proceeds from Life After Birth will be donated to The Black Women’s Health Imperative to support the NOURISH program — a Postpartum Doula training program created in partnership with Knix that supports the needs of Black birthing families. 

The NOURISH curriculum was designed by the National Black Doula Association, and we were so grateful to sit down with its CEO & Founder, Tracie Collins. Meet Tracie. 

Hi Tracie! Tell us a bit about yourself and how you got into the doula field. 

I’ve been in this field for almost 22 years. I started in the year 2000 after I had my son. I started off as a doula then transitioned into midwifery about 2 years into my doula career. I studied, apprenticed and practiced in Oakland—  but I decided not to stay on the midwifery side after pretty much completing all my necessary requirements. Instead, I took everything that I learned and brought it  back to being a doula. 

I was able to successfully marry the foundations of midwifery and traditional midwifery (to be really specific), and blend it with people who are birthing in the hospital system that needed a doula. With my experience, I was able to support people birthing in homes, hospitals and in birthing centres. So much so, that I became known for and cemented as someone who did “quick births” —  quick natural deliveries that take 6 hours or less. 

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by National Black Doulas Asso. ® (@nationalblackdoulas)

What I did was create a system in which I'd combine nutrition and other elements that put the body in the most efficient place for labour and delivery. This would result in having a healthier birthing person and a healthier baby in the end. And that’s what we want!

What led you to starting the National Black Doula Associations? 

Really simply—  something had to be done about the Black maternal health rate. So I founded the NBDA in October 2017 with 17 years already in the field. My initial thought was that it would just be a database that would pair Black and BIPOC birthing people with Black birthing professionals. Once I first started going live on Instagram, people started to get a taste of my personality, background, and my knowledge. And people would say to me—  we want you to train us. 

So, in 2019 I started creating a curriculum for the NBDA. We’ve quickly grown into the leading organization when it comes to training BIPOC birthing professionals. But also, we’ve created a system for BIPOC birthing families to be able to find support that looks like them—  people who understand the system they’re up against. 

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by National Black Doulas Asso. ® (@nationalblackdoulas)

On the NBDA side, we’re really lucky to now have 11 trainers and nearly 300 members across the country who are listed in our directory. We have elevated the Black birthing professional and then at the same time, married that with helping families in our communities. 

People like that I say it like it is. I don’t have time to bite my tongue. We’re dying. And until we stop dying and things change, then I’m just going to call it like it is. Because we have work to do. 

Through Life After Birth, we focus quite a bit on the postpartum time period. What do postpartum doulas do? And why is that care especially important for Black birthing parents? 

When I started out in the field, there was no such thing as a postpartum doula. There were just birthing doulas. Over the course of time, postpartum doulas were implemented. But they were implemented incorrectly—  and I want to go on record saying this! 

The initial understanding of what a postpartum doula was is someone who comes in, helps mom and baby by cleaning the house, making meals, and running errands. And they all had different levels of certifications and training—  for example, some were night nurses, some were Certified Lactation Consultants who could support with breastfeeding. 

With that being said, there were no significant perimeters or definition of what a postpartum doula was. So when I created the Postpartum Doula Training, I knew I wanted to get in there and redefine it. 

From 0-3 months we’re helping parents successfully care for their baby and themselves. And we’re really specific about what that means. It means they’re a professional who is trained, certified (or in the certification process), and they come in with a plan of support. They understand why it’s so important that when working with Black and Brown birthing parents, they’re looking for postpartum danger signs. 

What are some of the signs postpartum doulas look out for? 

For example, we suffer from C-sections that can happen if they’re not giving us enough time to birth our baby—  if our voices are not being heard. This happens at a higher rate for us, and it increases the chance of having a pulmonary embolism. They’re also looking for postpartum preeclampsia. We teach our doulas how to look out for these warning signs, and how to help their clients and their partners exercise their voice to say: this hurts, this doesn’t feel right, this doesn’t look right. 

We don’t want them to just flower it. Black women don’t hire doulas for the luxury of it. They hire doulas so their lives can be saved, because they understand the bureaucracy of what they’re up against. We focus on how to pay attention, and how to go up against the Western system in order to save a life. 

Did you take this same approach in creating your other doula programs as well? There really is a doula for everything—  how did these trainings come about? 

The Birth Doula Training is a really beautiful combination of history. It’s the understanding of how obstetrics and gynaecology came to be, it’s the understanding of how Black bodies were used as experiments, it’s the understanding of science and evidence, and it’s learning the execution of business—   all wrapped into one.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by National Black Doulas Asso. ® (@nationalblackdoulas)

The Sex Doula Training came about because there’s such a disconnect with the body, especially if you've recently gaven birth. In birthing situations you’ll probably hear the phrase: I don’t want to look down there. Now, “down there” is a term I’m not too fond of. So, how do we bridge that gap? How do we help people see that sex is the thread through it all?

What we’re finding with the Sex Doula Intimacy Coach Training is that there are so many layers that people need to unpack just to realign themselves with their bodies. Especially with Black bodies—  we’ve been raped ever since we’ve been here. So there’s an automatic dissociation from a physical, and even a cellular DNA stand point with us. 

Even in the Holistic Fertility Doula Program, it’s like—   how do we focus this practice on a holistic point of view that helps to decongest the system? We understand that medicine can definitely play a part, we don’t negate that. It’s just not the only thing. 

You’ve helped there to be other options and more systems of support in place, it’s filling a very necessary need. That being said, what are some of the biggest issues Black women are facing when it comes to maternal health right now? 

Not being heard. Not being respected. And we don’t feel pain. The number one thing is we “don’t feel pain”. But if we can control the pain, we can control what’s causing the pain. But first, to control the pain—  that needs to be heard. 

Absolutely. Is that your hope for the future of Black maternal health? 

Well, we need to completely eradicate Western medicine. Point, period, blank. It’s based on the patriarchy, it’s based on a system of racism. So we need to completely annihilate it so we can build it up again from the ground up. And it needs to be built by people who are affected by the decisions made—  not by people without uteruses. We need to do that. When we talk about defunding the police and reforming housing laws, we also need to include conversations about Western medicine—  especially when it pertains to obstetrics and gynaecology. 

@nationalblackdoulas

@lifeafterbirth

Interview has been edited for length and clarity.

I am especially proud that 100% of the proceeds that Knix and Carriage House Birth receive from the book will go towards the NOURISH Postpartum program created in partnership with the Black Women’s Health Imperative. 

I first came up with the idea for Life After Birth when I was three days postpartum with my first child, Cole. Amidst a cloud of postpartum depression I was seriously struggling with breastfeeding - all the while wear-testing nursing bras that my team had designed. The irony was not lost on me. When I went to my personal Instagram page to share my struggles I was overwhelmed by the hundreds of messages I received in return. It turns out I wasn’t alone. In a world of picture perfect selfies, adorable Instagram babies dressed as little animals and the cringeworthy #blessed we had masked the real postpartum experience.  We so quickly forget that in those precious few moments of birth, you’re introduced to someone else entirely new. And it’s not your baby— it’s you. 

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Life After Birth Project (@lifeafterbirth)

Life After Birth didn’t start as a book, but rather a photography exhibit in Soho, Manhattan. The energy of opening night was unforgettable. The anticipation and nerves as we set up were running at an all time high. What would people think? Would it speak to them? What would become of this little passion project and message we needed the world to hear?

Joanna outside the Life After Birth gallery in New York.

Never in our wildest dreams could we have anticipated the response. There wasn’t a dry eye in the house— ours included. People spent hours combing through every photograph, reading every caption and reflecting on every story. It was immediately clear that every postpartum journey photographed was a window into the contributor’s soul, and people were genuinely drawn to these experiences. We knew we succeeded. We had built a connection; we had built a community.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Joanna Griffiths (@joannaknix)

We created this project to change society’s postpartum narrative. Magazine headlines are dominated with stories of celebrities “bouncing back” and maternity leaves are shorter than ever. We talk about the “fourth trimester” but in doing so, are limiting that part of the journey to a mere 12 weeks. 

We believe in a different postpartum experience. Instead of viewing postpartum as a matter of days or weeks or months, we honored the experience for what it truly is and recognized that we are postpartum forever. 

We believe that the power of storytelling can help us change this narrative. 

In many ways, this book follows the path of the exhibit that started it all— a journey through hundreds of stories that takes you down the beautiful, messy, humbling and transformative road that is life after birth. 

We hope you find connection and comfort in the stories in the book from contributors from all over the world. We are so incredibly thankful to the more than 750 people that submitted their journeys to us. You brought this beautiful project to life. A special thank you to Christy Turlington, Amy Schumer, Jillian Harris and Jemima Kirke who trusted us with their stories and came on board when this project was just an inkling of an idea. And of course, we are especially grateful to Ashley Graham for her beautifully honest forward. 

One of the magical things about putting this project together was that we had no idea what to expect. But one thing became abundantly clear very early on— that the postpartum journey brings out a different side to who you are. It unlocks newfound strength, patience, love and resilience that you likely didn’t know existed. 

And that’s the beauty of being postpartum forever—  you get to take all of these transformative moments, teachings, and experiences and keep them with you through every other journey life throws at you. We can’t wait to hear what you think of the book and we can’t wait to see what you do in your Life After Birth. 

Much love,  Joanna

Our family may seem a little different because we have 2 moms, but we find that people are often surprised by how relatable our family is to their own. The core value behind family, no matter what they look like, is always love. Throughout our time online, we’ve felt honored to help open the hearts of parents who have difficulties with the idea of their child being gay. Sometimes by seeing the example of our family, it helps them picture a happy future for their own child. 

There really is no better feeling than putting a smile on someone's face simply by being ourselves. Our little nook on the internet is a home for all and we hope it helps people feel less alone. 

Starting our IVF Journey Early

When we met in 2006, same-sex marriage wasn’t legalized in New York yet (it became legal on June 24th 2011). Because of this extra complication, we discussed the topic of creating a family together long before we discussed marriage. 

So fast forward to 2014—  and the planning of our wedding and the start of our fertility journey started to go hand-in-hand. We both agreed that as soon as our honeymoon was over we'd start our IVF (In Vitro Fertilization) cycle. We made sure to get everything in order beforehand because we knew that there was no guarantee that we'd get pregnant on the first try. There are a lot of steps before starting an IVF cycle: finding the right fertility group or doctor, pretesting for both of us since we were doing RIVF, paperwork, counseling, donor selection. The list goes on. 

Why Reciprocal IVF

Reciprocal IVF (RIVF) is when you take an egg (or eggs) from one partner, fertilize them to create an embryo (or embryos) and then transfer them into the other partner— who will then carry on with the pregnancy in their womb. RIVF was our top choice for starting our family because we both wanted to be part of the process in which our children were created. We did have a plan B,C,D and so on, in case RIVF didn't work out for us. Our end goal was always to have children whether RIVF worked for us or not. 

Luckily, after 3 transfer rounds and 5 embryos later, Mandi got pregnant with our first baby— who was born November of 2015. We always wanted 4 kids, so moving forward we decided to create the rest of our children the same way as our first. All 4 girls were created with Tara's egg, donor sperm and Mandi carried the pregnancies. In total we had 2 egg removals, 5 transfer days with 8 embryos transferred total, which gave us our 4 kiddos (all girls)! 

A System With Challenges 

With legal issues on equality constantly changing, it can be really hard to keep up. With that being said, during our first attempt to have a child through RIVF we had to get a lawyer involved to write some legal paperwork. This paperwork would ensure that Tara would protect her parental rights to the embryos that were going to be created. 

At that time, if an embryo was created with another person's egg (married or not) and was implanted into someone else, the person receiving the embryo would have all legal rights to the child. The donor would simply be labeled as an "egg donor" — giving up all parental rights. 

This wasn’t going to fly with us as we were creating this child together as a married couple. Luckily, when it was time to have our next baby, laws had been put in place so we didn’t have to get a lawyer involved in the already expensive process. However, it’s still advised in New York state to follow through with a second parent adoption once a child is born to protect all parental rights— even though we’re both listed on our girls’ birth certificates. 

If you’re going through it— 

As hard as it is, be open minded to challenges or changes in your original plan. It’s a heavy process, but once you're looking down at your child everything you went through will feel like it’s worth it.  

Celebrating Pride together

This is the first year that our girls are fully understanding Pride and what it means to our family. They are excited for everything rainbow because Mama's favorite color is white—so it's a nice change in our decor (haha). We might go to some local pride events but what we're most excited for is the opportunity to discuss all different types of families, people and what makes everyone special in their own way. Aside from that we're happy to be together wearing our matching rainbow pyjamas and baking yummy treats! 

Follow along with Tara and Mandi on Living Rosa here 🌈

From family, to friends, to co-workers and strangers online, this Pride Month we’re celebrating all the ways we’re able to make connections, create community, feel seen and share love. Follow along at @knix and on The Lift all month long for stories by people in our community we’re so proud to know. Click here to read more.

Honest as always is @thebirdspapaya— sharing a genuine, straightforward, joyous yet often messy glimpse of postpartum life. Sore nipples, newborn poop explosions, and adjusting to back to work life, Sarah has really bared it all— both educating and encouraging us all at once. 

.

We were so excited to catch up with Sarah last week to check in on how she’s doing, and how she’s navigating her new chapter during the pandemic. So throw on your Papaya Leggings and read more about Sarah's postpartum experience, and learn about what she's proudest of so far. 

Hi Sarah! What are 3 things you wish you knew before giving birth during the pandemic? 

I wish I knew that even though the pandemic had created SO many changes for us, we could still have a beautiful birth and an experience that we loved.

I wish I knew that both life and a pandemic are truly unpredictable—  so try to not have a mental “end date”.  You’ll set yourself up for potential disappointment when things change and you don’t get an opportunity to do X,Y or Z.

I wish I knew that there would be grief for the things that WOULD have been if it weren’t a pandemic. And that grief is very okay to have.

Has your postpartum experience been different because of it?

It’s been hard to not share Lemmie in person with people that we love. But being at home more really did lend itself to our own time as a family to bond, and gave me an opportunity to heal. I feel like I recovered better than I would have otherwise. 

.

What are some ways you were able to find community during this time? 

Online community is amazing! I have never been more grateful. I never felt alone. Not for a minute. I found birth podcasts and talking to those who gave birth in a pandemic were so, so valuable to helping me grasp what was ahead.

What's something new you've learned about your body recently? 

At my last midwife appointment, I was asking about certain things that still felt off about me— things like stiffness and soreness. She told me (and I learned) that pregnancy and birth recovery is not just a 6-week journey. It’s actually more like a year, so that definitely made it feel less daunting. It felt like, “I’m okay, I’m doing what I’m supposed to. My body is too”. 

From our Life After Birth Project, Sarah reflects on being postpartum: "It took almost a decade to stop feeling ashamed of my softness, my stripes, my scars. ⁣And to start seeing and owning my strength, my power, my worth"

.

What are you proudest of right now?

I think I’m just incredibly proud that as someone who ended up with really difficult prenatal depression, that I sought help. I fought for my mental health and honored my feelings through changes in physical health during my pregnancy—  even when it was difficult. I’m really glad that I let myself feel all the feels and didn’t just try and brush them off.

All 📸  from @thebirdspapaya. Follow along with Sarah for cute Lemmie pics, and to join her amazing community of incredibly supportive people. 

Between last minute preparations, meetings and appointments, we were so excited to catch up with Joanna before her new adventure begins. Read on to learn about her experience carrying twins, what it's like to be pregnant during the pandemic, and how she was able to find community during the last few months. 

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Joanna Griffiths (@joannaknix)

.

How's it going Jo! At the time of us chatting, how far along are you? How’re you feeling? 

I am 35 weeks and 3 days— with 5 days to go until my induction (March 8!). So in other words… I’m in the final stretch. 

I am feeling OK. My body is in a lot of pain and has been for a couple of months now. But I feel fortunate that I am not on bedrest and am still able to lift my son, walk around and do what I love (work at Knix). There is so much going on with work that the days are flying by which is definitely a distraction. 

What’s the biggest difference this round of pregnancy compared to your last? 

Well, to start off— I'm having twins so that in and of itself is different! But for the most part everything is different this time around. With my first child, Cole, I had a very easy pregnancy and my biggest complaint was wait times for my appointments. 

This time I've had a high risk pregnancy. At my 20 week anatomy scan they picked up on a large cyst in one of my twins, so that has required a lot of extra monitoring and worry. In the beginning it looked like it was kidney related and that one of our girls would be born with a single functioning kidney. 

Since that initial diagnosis, we’ve switched gears to think that the cyst is ovarian. I’ve had bi-weekly ultrasounds and watched as the cyst grew from 3 cm to a peak of 9 cm. It’s given me a new level of respect for people who go through challenging pregnancies— and a deep understanding of fearing the unknown when it comes to someone inside you that is so small and helpless. I’ve come to learn that we do not give enough credit to pregnant people and what they might be going through. 

📸: @nikkileighmckean

On top of that, it’s just been far more physically draining. Carrying twins is no joke! It’s by far the hardest physical thing that I have gone through. It’s a big physical strain on your body that makes it hard to sleep, move, eat and even breathe. 

Finally, with this being my last pregnancy (3 kids under 2 is plenty for me) I’ve been holding onto it in different ways. Even as I write this— as much as I want to be finished with the pain and discomfort, I know these are my last few days of feeling life inside of me. There is something surreal about that— like the end of a chapter in the story that is my body.

I’m nervous about how my life is going to change. I'm wondering how my heart could possibly hold space for two more little ones when it currently belongs to Cole. But I’ve heard such beautiful stories from other people. I’m learning that love isn’t finite— it grows exponentially. And with each new little one you grow another heart. 

What's been the most challenging part about being pregnant in the midst of the pandemic? 

The hardest part by far has been going to my appointments alone, as visitors aren’t allowed. Especially the difficult appointments where you’re learning that there is something wrong with your unborn child. It’s a lot to take on solo. Especially when all you want to do is hug your partner and ask them to tell you that everything is going to be okay— and you can’t. 

Has your birth plan changed at all because of it?

My birth plan is a bit more involved than the last time. I will go in at 36 weeks to the day and the first thing they will do is drain the twin’s cyst in utero. From there I will be induced and the plan is that I will deliver both twins vaginally. With twins, you deliver in an operating room in the event that there is an issue with twin B and an emergency C section needs to be performed. There is also quite the audience. Between the 2 OB’s, each twin has a paediatric team as well as nurses— it’s going to be quite the party. 

📸: @nikkileighmckean

One thing I know for SURE is that this time I am opting for the epidural. I delivered Cole vaginally and without pain relief while on pitocin. Practicing HypnoBirthing was one of the most powerful experiences of my life. I’m excited to have a different birth experience this go around. 

What are some ways you were able to find community during the last 9 months? 

I have been so lucky to really connect with my OB Dr. Carmen McCaffrey at St. Michael’s hospital in Toronto. I met her through our PPE donation program at the start of COVID last year. The OB unit had run out of PPE and she actually stopped by my house to pick up the first shipment of N95 masks we had. She has gone above and beyond for me throughout this pregnancy and it has meant the world to me. I can’t express how important it is to feel supported by your birth team. With COVID, I’m not allowed a doula and only one support person— so I feel grateful to have found another in the form of my OB. 

What’s something new you’ve learned about your body recently? 

Honestly, I’m just in awe of what the human body is capable of. As I write this I carry 3 hearts, 3 brains, 12 limbs, 60 fingers and toes. It truly is a miracle. 

What are you the proudest of during this pregnancy?

I’m proud of making it this far. I’m proud of navigating the uncharted waters of a high risk pregnancy and for not letting it beat me mentally. And I’m so proud that I’ve been patient and kind to myself. I have so many other proud moments too, but that’s for another update and blog! 

Congrats Jo and thanks for sharing this part of your journey with us. For twin updates (and cute baby pictures), follow along with Jo here. And to see how we celebrate all the amazing womxn in our community, check out @knixwear! 

.

Last year, I watched a video of a man being arrested outside a store, pinned to the ground by the knee of a police officer. That video stirred the nation, the world, and opened the eyes to police brutality in the Black community, racism and the Black Lives Matter movement.

As I watched the news coverage, I looked over at my 2 sons and began to cry. Thoughts raced through my mind. When will their first overt experience with racism be? How will they react? What will their futures be like? How do I talk to them about this? 

.

Because the truth is, it could have easily been them at that store. When they’re older, I can picture it so clearly: they’re hanging out with their friends, showing off, speaking loudly, catching the attention of police, being pinned down, possibly killed. I had thoughts no mother should have. Unfortunately, these are thoughts that every Black mom in America has, constantly.

I want to raise my boys to be loving and tolerant of everyone. This has become increasingly difficult for me, knowing that they will not be treated that way in return.

The best I can do (and what we all can do) is instill confidence, strength, and self worth. Teach them to be unbothered by the actions of others, because the actions of others do not determine who they are. 

What you tell your children about themselves is what they will believe. My sons are now 8 and 6. I want them to believe they are living in a beautiful world where they will be accepted and appreciated. But that will not always be the truth. So as parents, what do we do?

You might think that approaching the topic of racism with your child is going to be difficult. And any approach needs to be age specific, which might make this seem even harder.

It’s not complicated though. The bottom line is— simple decency and goodness starts at an early age.

Teaching kids about cultural differences promotes tolerance.

Teaching kids not to be bullies, and to show kindness promotes acceptance.

Teaching kids has a lot to do with your own actions too. Be aware of your own biases as an adult, and how you interact and respond to others— kids watch your every move. 

Black leaders have been fighting for equality and justice since before I was born.  And unfortunately, racism and intolerance (in some kind of form) will be around when I die. As a Black parent to Black sons, this is a great disappointment and burden to my children.

At the end of the day, we can change laws, but if we do not change attitudes, perceptions and behaviors then very little has changed at all. And it all starts with teaching tolerance to our kids. 

@dianneallmanrn

While it’s more ‘mainstream' news now (shout out to NPR and The New York Times), it has been a long time truth that Black Mothers have the highest mortality rates in the Western World. Some years ago I gleaned that, where I live in New York City, maternal mortality rates are 13x higher amongst black women. Learning this just shortly before I gave birth to my daughter, was very sobering. I was lucky enough to have had access to a doula. Shout out to the wonderful Chanel Porchia of Ancient Song Doula Services in Brooklyn and to my doula and dear friend Christine Mahoney of Obeah Woman Botanicals. 

Throughout a great majority of my pregnancy I had experienced being slighted so terribly by nurses and doctors that I made it a point to change my provider at 32 weeks. One particular experience, reflecting my invisibility in these spaces, was having a nurse ask me to take a pregnancy test— even though I had been there three times previously. Not to mention, I was already five months pregnant. After desperate research for a Black midwife, and an OBGYN of color, I made the switch happen. It was after this community reboot occurred that things drastically improved. A change in the community that provided care for me was key to giving me a birth story that many women do not have the chance to tell. 

My doula Christine was useful in providing education about what my resources were, and clueing me in to holistic alternatives for physical and mental wellness. Her newfound care emboldened me to sign up for affordable prenatal yoga, which was monumental in helping me treat painful pregnancy sciatica. I was able to tackle less tangible things, like having a realistic approach to my diet. I was given food journals, and was able to meaningfully reflect about my experiences as a pregnant person with her. Despite not having traditional support (#singlemom alert), I was able to lean on my doula emotionally, spiritually and physically. 

For my actual six hour labor, I was blessed to find a midwife, who was a direct reflection of me, as she was also a Haitian Black woman. My birth was rapid, which was unusual for a first-time delivery. I was afraid and worn out, and just as I was going to try to give in to an intervention, my midwife Sabine Juedy was able to keep me grounded, and got me together. Overall, I realized just how lucky I was to have been saved from an experience that could have been fatal. I was able to survive because I had a community who were truly invested in my highest good, and worked hard through postpartum care.

Oftentimes, folx confuse the kind of maternal support roles there are. A doula is very different from a midwife. A midwife can often be juxtaposed to a doctor, as they are medically trained to deliver, and if absolutely necessary perform any emergency surgical duties. Doulas deal with emotional, mental, physical and oftentimes moral/spiritual support. I am a full-spectrum doula, dealing with all kinds of maternal care, including abortion, bereavement, labor and postpartum work. My current focus is postpartum work which can include regularly checking in with the parent(s). The time just after delivery is critical as many Black and Brown folx experience “baby blues” and postpartum depression. 

In the Black community, postpartum depression is not something readily discussed, and is often overlooked because of distractions in environmental and economic disparities. Sometimes postpartum work can look like mild therapy, or cooking a meal or even helping a parent take a nap! This work drastically varies depending on the doula, and the needs of the client. It is imperative that Black and Brown pregnant people have care that provides them a safe space to truly be listened to and supported. Everyone deserves an environment that reflects their values and needs. It should be noted that postpartum care does not look one way and can span from 6 weeks after birth to two years after birth. It’s important to also consider the value of doulas and midwives who are a part of LGBTQIA+ communities. The more intersections that are reflected in healthcare, the more likely it is that no one gets left behind.

I believe we all have a responsibility to ensure that all people are treated with tenderness. 

Support your local organizations. Do research on what grassroots organizations contribute meaningfully to the communities of color near you. If you are not a person of color, consider how your voice can amplify these issues. Consider how your access can lead to others finding resources they never knew could be afforded to them. If you are not a person of color, consider how your intersection can create visibility for the Black folx around you. 

Evaluate what you can contribute. Donate money, supplies or time. In Brooklyn, places like Ancient Song Doula SERVICES are aimed to serve Black Women and Women of Color in wonderful capacities, including community doula trainings. There are organizations like the Black Doulas Association that provide access to doulas that specifically reflect the communities they intend to serve. 

Petition for Health Care Providers to provide stipends for doula care, as most of this work is underfunded. Most importantly, find ways to connect with your local government about pushing through legislation that allows for doulas to be paid with insurance, instead of out of pocket. The more we use our will and privilege to provide access to others, the more we can see a world that is reflective of love and unity we all desire. After all, it truly takes a village.

Be Well
Cat Francis (She/Her/They)
@catfranciscatfrancis
@temperanceandwellness 

Through this, Knix met Colleen Strong— who describes herself as a fearless Harley-riding Grandma. In 2012, Colleen was diagnosed with breast cancer after receiving her first mammogram after turning 50, and soon after had a double mastectomy. We were absolutely honored that she would share her story with us, and bare all for the Age Doesn’t Matter Campaign. You can read more about Colleen here. 

We recently caught up with Colleen to see what life’s been like after being in a commercial seen all across North America (no big deal)! 

It's been a few months since the commercial filmed, what have you been up to since? 

We’ve been busy! We had just sold our businesses and embarked on a 6 week celebration trip when COVID struck. I had a surgery scheduled to remove one of my breasts because of a recalled implant which was cancelled. It’s been an adjustment for sure but the silver lining is we are able to provide childcare for our 18 month granddaughter when my daughter’s maternity leave ended and the daycare wasn’t open yet. 

What was it like seeing yourself on TV? 

It was a shock! I didn’t realize the ad was going to transition to TV and I got an excited text from a friend saying they had seen it. Everyone kept messaging me saying they’d seen it but it took me a couple of days to actually see it myself. When I saw it for the first time I was sitting with my husband and he got very emotional because he was so happy for me and proud. 

What has the reaction from people been like? 

It’s been overwhelmingly positive. So many women responded how exciting it was to see older women validated and celebrated. My family was really excited although I’m not sure my son or brother were prepared to see me that exposed 😂

What's been the most memorable part of the experience? 

There was so much that was memorable. Meeting all the incredible bad-ass women was amazing. At one point in the shoot I looked out and noticed that almost all of the production crew were women. I was so proud of Joanna and the Knix team for choosing to give opportunities to women. 

So... would you ever model for Knix again? 

Yes please!!!  My surgery to remove my tattooed breast is rescheduled for July 27th. Once I’m healed and my tattoo is repaired I’d love to represent the “Unicorn” ladies (women with a single breast post-mastectomy)!

Thanks Colleen, we love and appreciate you! Follow along with Colleen's journey here and watch her amazing interview on set below. 

Two years ago today, these words by the incredible Mari Andrew sparked emotional stories, healing and growth within our Knix community. From it, the Faces of Fertility campaign stemmed, and from there The Life After Birth Project blossomed. Read on to learn about these special initiatives that are so near to our hearts. 

Faces of Fertility 

Last year, Knix launched the Faces of Fertility podcast for one simple reason— we don’t speak openly enough about our fertility journeys. Through this podcast, Knix CEO and founder Joanna Griffiths and health journalist Katherine Flemming lift the veil on some of the most stigmatized fertility topics such as surrogacy, miscarriage, pregnancy loss and infertility. Through interviews and storytelling, Faces of Fertility aims to make these experiences a little less isolating. You can check out the first season on Apple Podcasts and Spotify, and you can learn more about the podcast here. 

The Life After Birth Project

The Life After Birth Project was initially a travelling gallery that highlighted postpartum journeys, as well as the stories that honor the transformative and unique experience of giving birth. Touring everywhere from Toronto to LA, we were honored to share all of your eye-opening and emotional stories with the world. You can still be part of the experience by visiting our digital gallery here. A growing project that normalizes and honors postpartum experiences, we are excited to see LAB forever evolve. 

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Life After Birth Project (@lifeafterbirthproject) on Oct 4, 2019 at 2:00pm PDT

We are so proud to be part of so many of your motherhood journeys. Between your emails, DM’s, and stories submitted for the Life After Birth Project, we love growing alongside you. Happy Mother’s Day from all of us at Team Knix! 

Follow Knix on Instagram @Knixwear, and join the conversation about postpartum life on @LifeAfterBirthProject. 

Between raising two boys and working, we’re still not totally sure how she found time to check in with us (moms really are magic), but we’re so glad she did. Meet Dianne. 

Can you tell us a bit about what you do, and why you got into nursing in the first place? 

I am an acute dialysis nurse at NYU Winthrop in Mineola, NY. I administer dialysis treatments to patients in end stage renal failure. Dialysis is a purification of blood, a substitute for normal kidney function. I chose the nursing profession because it is a career that makes a difference, and something I’ve always wanted to do. It is also fairly flexible, allowing me to balance family and work life.

How has your day to day changed since COVID-19? 

My day to day has drastically changed since the onset of COVID-19, both at work and at home. I spend a lot more time at work now and our workload has increased tremendously. I spend all day at work 7am-7pm, dialyzing patients in the COVID units and ICUs. My days off are spent with my family, paying attention to the kids and their school work and time with hubby. I try to make the day as normal as possible for the kids, even though they know things are strange right now. They miss school, they miss their friends and their routine—their day to day has been impacted as well.

While you’re working all of these extra hours (thank you!), you’re also the mom of 2 adorable little boys. We bet that wasn’t the easiest task even before the pandemic. How has it been managing motherhood? 

Yes, you are so right! Motherhood is never easy, pandemic or not. This pandemic has just proven so far that as a mom, you are everything to your kids. When schools close, you become the teacher. When boredom sets in, you become creative. When the world stands still, it is up to you to keep it going for their sake. Parenting has definitely been challenging so far, but it is important to keep it calm for your children. I’m so lucky to have an amazing husband and supportive teachers throughout all this. Moms definitely need a support system at this time, and I’ve been very lucky. I’ve been battling with more guilt than the usual ‘mom guilt’ because of more hours at work, but I know it’s not permanent.

Tell us about your kids! What are they like? What are their favourite things? What do you hope for them? 

My two boys definitely keep me on my toes! They're 7 and 5 (soon 6). They are very active boys but such different personalities. My oldest Ethan, is so outgoing, friendly and super witty. My little guy Cameron can be very shy and so loving. They make a good team, they fight but stand up for each other. They enjoy each other’s company— something I’m so happy for especially during this time. They love arts and crafts, dinosaurs, vanilla ice cream and LEGO! I want everything to be amazing for my children, but the bottom line is, I want them to be happy no matter what they do. And whatever they do, I want them to be confident. Happiness and Confidence.

Is there anything you’re excited to do with them after this slows down? 

Well, our Jurassic Park Live world tour got cancelled due to the pandemic. I would love to do that with them, as we were all looking forward to it. Also plenty of beach and pool time. My kids love the beach.

As the weather starts getting warmer, more and more people will want to start venturing outdoors-- especially if they have kids. From your perspective, why is it so important to us to follow #StayHome orders?

It is imperative to follow #StayHome orders to flatten the curve, slow the rate of infection, and prevent the spread of the virus to others. A person could carry the virus and not be symptomatic, and transmit it to someone more susceptible, who will develop serious symptoms. It is also important to stay home to give us (healthcare workers and hospitals) a chance to win the battle. Staying home prevents spikes in infections and admissions, thus ensuring we have the resources and equipment to fight this.

Thanks Dianne— both for sharing with us and for working on the front lines during this time. To follow Dianne's journey (and to see more of her cute kids), check her out here

Almost a year later, we caught up with one mom who joined us to see how new motherhood is treating her, what her fertility journey was like, and what it's like to be a postpartum and gender non-conforming mom. Meet Sophia! 

You were pregnant when we saw you last, how has life been since then?

It's been quite the roller coaster of emotions. I gave birth in September after a few days of various induction methods, 7 attempts at an epidural, and finally a C-section. We have a baby girl who is now 7 months and a 5 year old son. After giving birth I was not prepared for the emotions. Even though I witnessed my wife give birth, I was shocked. There were times that I sobbed for no reason and could not recognize some of the sounds of my own cries. I could not understand what was happening to me, even though I knew rationally that my body was processing a lot of hormones.

I was also swollen through the third trimester and was told it would get worse before better when I left the hospital but on day 4 my swelling started to get worse. Then my breathing became impacted. I asked those around me and it was chalked up to anxiety. One week postpartum at 3 AM, my wife called 911. 

The paramedics assessed and didn't seem to think anything was wrong and one mentioned anxiety. I was alone and terrified. The first nurse that I met told me that I had the baby blues, took my blood, and told me to sit on a chair in the corner. A chair? I had a c-section one week ago! I went to the nurses station and had to advocate for myself until someone heard me. Magically, a room was empty and I was given a bed. 

After a series of X-rays, CT scans, and an echocardiogram, I was told that I had congestive heart failure and litres of fluid in my lungs. I was admitted at 10 PM to the cardiac intensive unit for them to understand what was going on. Finally, a diagnosis: postpartum preeclampsia. I was in the hospital for 3 days, 3 days without my brand new baby. She was just in me and now I was separated from her. She was too new and I couldn't give her what she needed from me.

Thankfully my wife could be with her and our son and my friends and mom could be with me. I was not prepared for my heart to fail and for my body to change so much. I was not prepared to feel like my body failed. For 6 weeks I remained on blood pressure medication and was full of anxiety and guilt beyond that. I was afraid that I would fail my family. But my wife, my friends, and my therapist got me back on track. Seven months later I am healing and loving every (ok *almost* every) moment with our new addition.

What was your fertility journey like?  

Ah fertility, that is something that I took for granted! As I mentioned earlier my wife and I share 2 kids and she gave birth to our first. We chose her to carry first because I was not entirely sold on becoming pregnant and she is older than me (sorry babe!). It took her longer than we expected but within the "average time for heterosexual couples" to get pregnant. 

During her pregnancy, my desire to be pregnant and feel a human grow became strong. It was the science of it that drew me in. I wanted to know what it felt like to feel the baby punch and kick from the inside. So we decided that I would give it a go. Given that we knew it would take some time I started to try when our son was 9 months old. We had grandiose plans of their age difference and time off together because she was going to be on sabbatical. I went in so cocky. I was proud of my "fresh, young eggs" (relative to my wife). In medical speak though, I was almost a geriatric patient (ok not totally, I was 33 so not a spring chicken). I didn't get pregnant. 

Years passed on and month after month, I faced only rejection. I did everything that I could using Western (repeated IUIs, IVF, etc.) and Eastern (acupuncture, boat loads of natural pills, no caffeine, no sugar, etc.) medicine. Three years later we decided that we would go back to my wife. But there was also the option of using her eggs and I carry, so I had another chance. I was excited and sad at the same time. I could possibly carry but I would not have a "mini-me" through genetics. My wife went through the egg retrieval and after waiting we learned that we had only one embryo. 

I lost all hope of carrying because it did not make sense for me to carry when my wife had a proven, successful pregnancy. We sat down with the doctor who told us that it did not matter which body the embryo went into. My wife, being the incredible human that she is, said that she wanted me to go for it so long as I wouldn't punish myself if it didn't work. We agreed I would try, but there were still a few tests to "pass". Upon further testing, there was evidence of possible endometriosis. The doctor treated me for two months for the inflammation and then we went in for the embryo transfer. Nine days later and after a dozen home pregnancy tests we confirmed the pregnancy! It was quite the experience and there are still pangs of sadness about the genetic piece or that my body somehow failed me but then I remind myself that my body is a warrior and fought for me and the kids look like me!

Can you speak a bit about some of the challenges of pregnancy and parenting as a queer, gender nonconforming person?

One of the biggest challenges of pregnancy as a queer, gender nonconforming person honestly is my chest. I didn't expect it to get much larger, especially since I was not breast/chest feeding. I never bonded with my boobs, didn't really want them and now they are there and bigger and I hate them. Clothing does not sit right, the way that I want it to— flat. 

Another challenge for me personally was the need for people to want to touch my body. I never understood nor had the desire to touch pregnant people and now was faced with people noticing my body. It became visible to people, feminine, and all of a sudden my body was one that people felt they had permission over. I declined all requests to touch me and made some people really stop in their tracks— shocked and confused.  In addition to my body being noticed, clothing on my body became confusing and difficult. Everything in the beginning was flowy or flowery. Definitely not me! Eventually I found a great mix of T-shirts, slim maternity pants, and blazers that allowed me to feel as me as I could through the pregnancy. That ended up becoming a source of joy— the ability to rock my oxfords, and blazers while pregnant and stay as true to my style as I could.

Photo By: Zurry Donevan 

As a parent, I am fortunate to feel the same joys and challenges as gender conforming individuals. I was afraid that I would be judged as not a "real parent" but no one has treated me any differently than my wife when referring to our kids. I think people may question our roles when they see us but no one has questioned us directly.

What’s your favorite part about being a parent? 

Kid laughter. Hearing and seeing my kids laugh is my favourite. There's a joy I feel when I see their eyes twinkle with happiness. Also, watching Star Wars and playing with lightsabers with my 5 year old is a close runner up. 

Describe your kids to us! What are they like, what are their favorite things? 

My 5 year old is a witty, sharp, energetic kid. He is curious, loves going on adventures to find new beach glass and sticks, and is a very proud big brother. He loves Lego, his stuffed dog from Ikea that he named Marley, and riding his bike. He just started JK and really enjoyed (we're in a pandemic now) school. He's also a typical 5 year old who tells you that you don't know anything and has an answer for everything but is learning to genuinely apologize when he breaks something.

We are getting to know our 7 month old everyday. She loves food, especially avocados, sweet potatoes, and green beans. She's very vocal, probably because she's competing with her brother for attention! She has the best laugh and is so far easy to please.

You run an Instagram account that chronicles your journey with genderfluid fashion. What are your hopes for the fashion industry in terms of options especially for genderfluid individuals who are also pregnant or postpartum?

Thank you for mentioning my new Instagram account @sd.apper

My hope for the fashion industry is acknowledgement that genderfluid people exist, that we like clothes, and also go through a host of changes with our bodies and want clothing to follow in the journey. I did not want to use a rubber band to hold my pants together in pregnancy, I wanted pants that were slim, felt tailored, and dress shirts that accommodated my pregnant body. I didn't want to wear clothing from the men's section for style in an awkward size and I definitely did not want flowy and flowery for my new body. I just wanted a dress shirt that made room for my womb but let me button up to my neck. 

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Sophia Dhrolia (@sd.apper) on Apr 10, 2020 at 12:51pm PDT

Postpartum is all about high rise. I never appreciated the genius behind high rise bottoms. I find it extremely hard to find any dress pants and chinos that are slim and high rise! High rise underwear also felt like I stole my grandmother's undies until I discovered the Knix High Rise! I wish brands would think of genderfluid styles without labels and just offer more sizing. Maybe do more research into what genderfluid individuals look for and soft launch styles that would accommodate various bodies. I would absolutely love it if I could go into a store or online and shop for pants according to my size and curves and be offered styles that everyone can choose from. My perfect filter is: Pants, Slim or Skinny, and High rise (including joggers!). For shirts, a button down that accommodates my chest with a sports bra and a curvy waist but not accentuate these features. Is that too much to ask for?

Thanks for sharing Sophia! Be sure to follow along on Sophia's journey here. 

Your picture and story was one of the initial ones shared in the Life After Birth Project. Tell us about the photo! What inspired you to submit your story to us?

I submitted a photo of myself for the LAB Project with just my mid-section only, no face showing. There was reasoning behind it. I have Crohn's-Colitis and my disease had spread so fast that I was given an Ileostomy on my abdomen. It saved my life. I repeat, I would not be alive if it wasn't for this little intestine poking out through my belly! So I wanted to praise it and show it to the world. I didn't show my face, because to anyone else going through Ostomy surgery or fighting Crohn's, I wanted them to be able to picture their face on my body. I was inspired by myself to be honest. I wanted to inspire myself with my own courage to bare it all!

You’ve been so open about your experience with Crohn’s-Colitis and having an ileostomy. Can you tell us about your experience? Has it impacted you as a mom? 

I choose to be open about living with C&C because my end goal is to help others who are suffering in silence, who are scared, and who don't know how to accept themselves and love their new bodies. I feel just as sexy now as I did pre-surgery—probably more actually, because now I can thoroughly enjoy all the activities I do without fear and mapping out where all the bathrooms are. 

C&C has impacted being a mom immensely. I am chronically exhausted 24 hours a day, because of the nature of my insides. I don't absorb much of anything when it comes to vitamins and I'm deficient in a lot of things which drains my energy very quickly. Let’s just say LOTS of coffees get sipped up in my daily routine. 

I’m always trying to teach my kids about my illness, my daughter finds it fascinating. I’m always aware of where my kids are when we play too— I can never have a hand off my tummy when there are jumping kids! Or if one of them puts too much pressure on my stomach, I could pop my intestine out and prolapse it. I’m very, very cautious. Crohn's all in all has made raising kids hard, but it’s very manageable. I just have to pick my battles to fight each day to save energy for them! 

Describe your kids to us! 

My kids. Oh my, where do I start with my daughter Sky? She's 3.5 going on 10. She is all emotions at once, she is fearless, and so so comfortable in her own skin. She is always singing, always dancing, and always telling you that she loves you. Most of all, Sky is compassionate. She is always making sure that I’m okay, and when Crohn’s is giving me a hard time, she's the first one there trying to make me feel better. My favourite thing about Sky would be her ability to make everything fun and exciting. At least 3 times a week at dinner time she will stand up and yell BEST DINNER EVERRRRR. Her presence has to be known wherever she goes. 

My son Jax is 1.5, and he is a sweetie pie. He is gentle, soft, and a cuddle monster. Whenever I need a little love he's there and pursing his lips for kisses, oh my god does he love to give kisses! He's kind, caring and shy. My favourite thing about Jax is his heart, he's such a softy. His hair is pretty amazing too! I haven't had the heart to cut it yet, it’s a long blonde mullet. He's going for the "Jax Teller" look from Sons of Anarchy! 

Do you have any tips on how to balance home life under these current circumstances? 

Balancing life during COVID is difficult, as I’m sure it is for most families. Just before COVID hit, I was diagnosed with pretty bad depression. My doctor suggested I take a small trip with my husband away from family life as a little break (I’ve been a stay at home mom for years now). We never took a honeymoon so we figured this trip would make up for it. Days after we booked, the world stopped turning, so we had to cancel it. It’s like the universe heard that I needed some alone time and said, "Hold my beer"!

Stuck in my house with depression and my kids, you can assume some days are dark— but funny enough, most of them are great! I make sure that at least once a day the entire family goes outside on a walk or plays in the fresh air together. There’s also a lot of Disney+ streaming. 

Can you tell us why it’s so important (to you especially) for everyone to #StayHome if they can?

It’s especially important to me that people stay home if they can because I have an extremely low immune system. It’s barely hanging on by a thread. When COVID was showing up in places nearby, my husband (who works for the family business), stopped going to work in fear of getting me sick. I wouldn’t be able to fight it off. In this situation I am very blessed that he works for my parents! Our business is considered essential, so in any other circumstance he wouldn’t be able to leave. 

I catch the common cold first, and it hits me the hardest. From there, I catch everything that’s around. I think I’ve been sick for the past 7 Thanksgivings, Halloweens and Christmases, so it’s very rare that I’m not sick. I’m staying home for me, and for everyone else that has low immunity. We just can't fight the way a normal functioning body can.  

What’s your favorite part of being a mom?

My favorite part of being a mom is that I’m honoured to be my kids’ safest place to hide. When they get hurt or when they fall down, I get to be that safe place for them to come to. There’s no other feeling like it in the world.

I’m getting ready to give birth, and besides all the normal worries (sleep deprivation and nonstop crying), I’m struggling to find a nursing bra that is supportive and comfortable enough to wear all day long. I’ve read about your Evolution Bra, and I like that I could keep wearing it after weaning. Does it work for nursing moms?

Thanks,

Lindsey

*** 

Hey Lindsey 👋,

First, congrats! We’re so excited for the arrival of your new little one. Our Evolution Bra was the go-to for Knix moms for a loooong time, but we kept getting the same requests! Can you make this with leak proof pads? Can you make this easier to unclip? 

And so we launched our Postpartum Collection, which includes 2 comfy nursing options. The first is the Leakproof Nursing Bra. With extra absorbent removable pads, there’s no more crying over spilled milk. (Hot tip? You can also buy extra sets of pads, just in case). Our Leakproof tech is also quick-drying, which means no more leaks on your shirt. Or sheets. Or at work. Or while shopping. Or while kicking butt at whatever you do daily! 

While nursing, you might not think it’s possible to go bra-lass. Impossible, you might say, I can't trust my boobs! Well say hello to your wardrobe’s newest bundle of joy: The Leakproof Nursing Tank. Your new favorite first layer, this super smooth tank has a built in nursing bra. Boom, it’s almost as if our Nursing Bra and LuxeLift Evo Tank had a baby. 

If we know anything about boobs (and at Knix we know a lot), it’s that your breast size changes through all trimesters and beyond. With 4-way stretch fabric, both our nursing bra and tank adapts and recovers to accommodate changing breast shape. It’s also super soft and supportive, so it’s an added touch when the girls are feeling extra sensitive. 

Both the Nursing Bra and Nursing Tank are also really convenient. You’ve got your hands full, so you shouldn’t need to be Rubiks-cubing your bra strap undone just to feed your baby! For easier feeds, the premium clasps can be snapped open and closed with just one hand. Both are the perfect nursing companions, and we hope you think so too. 

Happy Knixing, 

xo

Pssst: We have a full maternity and postpartum collection. Stretchy undies? Check. CoreLove compression/leak proof underwear? Check. Shop here! 

One way to prepare for the emotional challenges of birth is to read positive affirmations during pregnancy and labor.  Reading these little mantras help to focus and encourage confidence and positivity, all while reminding you of your strength and resilience. Positive self-talk is simple but mighty.

We look at our phones all the time, so what better place to keep your mantra than as your phone wallpaper. Save your favourite affirmation to use as your new background, and let the positive self-talk begin! You got this!

In partnership with Carriage House Birth, the Life After Birth Project is a travelling gallery that highlights women’s postpartum journeys, as well as the stories that honor their transformative birthing experiences. 

During a sit-down with Refinery29, Joanna explained that she wanted to share a new kind of message with moms: “You are perfect as you, you are supported, and you are seen."

This is the moment that gave birth to the growing project of not only normalizing postpartum experiences, but honoring them as well: 

"I took this photo during a hospital visit with a lactation consultant three days postpartum. She told me my breasts were the same size and just as hard as "soccer balls" and handed me two ice packs to help with the swelling. 

Elsewhere across town in those same few minutes, a team member stood in for me as we were honored with one of our biggest industry awards to-date. Mentally it was a battle. I could build a company, but I was struggling to feed my child. I felt like such a failure. The nurse provided me with nipple shields, something I knew nothing about but saved me during that first month. 

Every image of breastfeeding I had seen the women looked natural, at peace and happy. I shared this photo and my sentiments on Instagram and was overwhelmed when over 100 people responded with their own struggles. In that instant, the idea for the Life After Birth Project was born. In that moment, my eyes were opened."

~~

Earlier this month, The Life After Birth Project kicked off in NYC with an exhibit that included the stories of 250 women who boldly shared their birth and postpartum experiences. Some of these women include Amy Schumer, Jemima Kirke, Jillian Harris and Ricki Lake. And we aim to grow the conversation and expand these narratives as the gallery travels across North America.

Our goal? 1000 submissions from beautiful, strong, powerful givers of life. 

After wrapping up a successful tour in Toronto, we continued the conversation in Los Angeles atThe Riveter (@theriveterco). 

We still want you to be part of it. To share your own photos with the Life After Birth Project, tag @lifeafterbirthproject and use the hashtag #LifeAfterBirth, or email lifeafterbirth@knix.com.