Have you ever reached an important milestone and wished you could send a dispatch to your younger self?
That’s what Sarah Landry felt—or, at least, her reflex as a recent graduate of her 30s was to share what she’s gleaned from her transformative decade. Inspired by her insights, we asked: what advice would you give your 30-year-old self?
For the creator behind The Birds Papaya, it was an opportunity to get candid about the highs and lows; a moment to reflect on just how much one’s life can change in just a few years. From raising three kids solo as a newly single mom to finding love, redefining family, navigating body image, and ascending the ranks of internet fame, there’s plenty to look back on.
So, it’s no surprise that Sarah has plenty to say to her 30-year-old self—and no matter your age, we’re willing to bet her insights will ring true.
Give Yourself Grace
If Sarah could sit down with her 30-year-old self, she’d take a reassuring tone. In fact, she recently did—kind of.
“Recently in a hypnotherapy session we were discussing my fears for the future, the unknown. My therapist prompted me to reflect back on myself as a child, 10 years ago, and today,” says Sarah. “In that reflection she had me imagine a tender moment with my past selves.”
About to be divorced with three kids, she remembers a past version of herself that felt unsure about what the future held. “Yet in my mind, I imagined sitting with her, braiding her hair, and recognizing that she had such strength and resiliency, just without the perspective yet,” she shares. “After a big long hug, I would tell her ‘you got this, you really do.’”
It’s a moment of tenderness and clarity that makes us wonder, how often do we forget that we’re stronger than we give ourselves credit for?
Stop Chasing an Idealized Version of Yourself
“30 was when I was at my lowest weight,” says Sarah.
This was mostly intentional, though the stress she was experiencing at the time was a contributing factor. At this lowest weight, however, she felt the opposite of what she expected to feel. “I was at my lowest weight and my lowest self-esteem,” she admits. “I was terrified of gaining weight. I was terrified of what would happen after the ‘after’ photo.”
For Sarah, the “after” photo was supposed to represent a kind of finish line. Instead, it became a trap. “I’d put so much of my self-worth into external validations and was on the brink of taking that all back—I just didn’t know it yet,” she says.
Looking back, she recognizes how much energy went into chasing a certain version of herself. That realization was a turning point in allowing her to reclaim her sense of self-worth.
Confidence Is a Practice
If there’s one thing Sarah has learned, it’s that confidence isn’t some magical quality you wake up with. It’s something you practice doing, even when it feels uncomfortable.
“I really thought losing weight would make me confident. It did the opposite,” she explains. “But it taught me that I could choose it. I could choose to be confident. I could choose to just do the things I wanted even when I wasn’t feeling confident. Almost every time, the feeling would follow the action.”
It’s a lesson that applies to more than body image. The idea that action can pave the way for confidence opens the door to trying, failing, and trying again. It’s not about perfection—it’s about persistence.
Learn to Let Go
“So many moments shaped who I am today, but the 30s for me were what many experienced in their 20s,” Sarah shares. “I was a mom of three by 25 and a stay-at-home mom for all of my 20s. So at 30, I was working, traveling, falling in love, and learning to love my life in the body I was in. I learned to stop restricting and controlling so much. I learned to let go. I learned to live more.”
We all have notions of who we’re “supposed” to be but, sometimes, the best part of getting older is letting go of those expectations. For Sarah, it wasn’t about changing who she was but letting go of who she thought she had to be.
Make Space for the Unexpected
One thing Sarah’s 30-year-old self wouldn’t believe? That she’d end up modeling underwear and swimwear for a living. “That is definitely the most shocking,” she laughed. “I mean, I swam in t-shirts my entire teen years, wore a shirt in the bedroom for most of my adult life.”
It’s not just the modeling that feels surreal—it’s the comfort she’s found in her body. “Life is meant for actually living, not holding myself back because my body doesn’t fit some weird little societal mold that shouldn’t exist in the first place.”
It was in her 30s she discovered that confidence doesn’t come from fitting in—it comes from stepping outside the mold entirely.
Find Strength in Community
“I wouldn’t have my career if it wasn’t for community,” Sarah says. “After 16 years, we’ve been on so many journeys together. Some stayed. Some left. But I love having a group of people to share life with and laugh with and show up for—especially as I’ve been learning how to show up for myself.”
Community, for Sarah, isn’t just about numbers or metrics. It’s about connection—the messy, imperfect kind that grows over time. It’s about showing up, being seen, and allowing others to do the same.
Embrace the 'Now'
Looking back, Sarah’s advice to her 30-year-old self is simple: Stop waiting for the perfect moment. Stop holding yourself back. Stop thinking you need to change to be worthy.
It’s not flashy advice. It doesn’t come with a step-by-step guide. But it’s real. And maybe that’s the point—life isn’t waiting for the perfect version of you to show up. It’s happening now, and it’s yours to live to its fullest, imperfections and all.
You future self is proud. Who knows, maybe she's even braiding your hair.